Category: Romanticism

Do you want to know how to be attractive? This is a girls guide for looking good written by a man. I will do my best to give you a recipe for beauty.

Attraction is not a constant. At certain times in your life you will vary in attractiveness, depending on your ability to understand the ideals of beauty.  Ugly in your teens or 20s often equates to being cordial the rest of your life. The key idea about if you want to know how to be attractive is as follows. Take a deep breath and relax. I can assure you one-hundred percent you are drop-dead gorgeous. I know this for a fact. You are a stunning dream in terms of physical look. I promise.

Why?

• Evolution has brought your DNA this far.
• God does not make mistakes.
• I am a man of the world and I have never in my whole life seen a woman that was not beautiful. I mean that with all my heart.

If you have read my blog on love you already know what I have to say. However, in this post I will try to spell it out more clearly, from A to Z. If you do not like my opinion, tell me, but I am a guy, and I do not know you, therefore, I have no reason to lie. I do not promote any beauty products and I do not care if you listen to my advice,  or believe it, I have no hidden agenda. I am sincere.  I will tell you like it is.  It is the way to be attractive to a man. Do not listen to all those lame beauty posts and claims by women magazine writers. They are wrong. Why they write such nonsense I have no idea.   Here is how a girl can look good. I do not mean to shock you with my advice, but remember the fairy-tale about the ‘Emperors new clothes’? I will tell you how to look attractive.

How to have great looking hair

Let start from on the top. Do not color or fry, perm or treat  your hair in any way, unless there is a real need, like you are seventy years old all gray, then maybe.

Do not cut your hair. Let it grow natural and long.  The best is to the small of your back, but certainly past your shoulders. I do not want to hear lame excuses it is too much work, you are a career woman, do you want to be beautiful or do you want to look whatever? I do not even like shoulder length hair. There is no rush for a guy when he sees a girl in a hair bob.

A bob is for your girlfriends to tell you, ‘oh that looks cute’.  Are you going to date your girlfriends or do you want to be a princess and attract a prince?  Maybe you do not have your ideal guy has something to do with you listen to your girlfriends and poor style advice?

Listen to me, I am a guy and happily married in Europe. I have no reason to tell you something other than the take it or leave it truth.

No short and sassy look. Men like long hair with a natural texture. I can not tell you how many girls give their beautiful hair the fried look.

Buy natural conditioners or make your own, or just natural soap.  Do not spend too much money on hair products and nothing if you can with perfume.  Natural is better, less is more. You do not need to wash you hair that often as it strips it of its natural oils, just once in a while.

Of course stay out of the sun and some sun tanning etc. Almost let zero sun touch your skin, think yourself a vampire or a classic English lady from the 18th century, pale and lithe.  The sun destroys your skin like smoking does. This is so unattractive.

Take vitamins and eat right.  Instead of spending money on hairdressers, conditioners that treats the surface, spend it on essential corpulentty acids and vitamins. Do the research yourself or ask me a question.

What is attractive on a girl comes from within not from a topical application, take care of your body from the inside out.

What is the most attractive color for women’s hair? Blond, brunette or red-head? None of the above.  Natural.  How do I know? I live in Eastern Europe and a lot of these students do not have the money to do the things Western American girls do, yet for some reason they look ten times better. Respect your natural color, I have heard mousey brown and dirty blond hair, guys really like, I do.

Do not obsess about body hair either. Hair on your chest maybe pluck it out, but do not stress about it. If you are going to the beach sure shave your legs, but we are mammals and mammals have hair. Do not feel you have to look like a child or angel to look good. Just the opposite. Men like women, with all their strange mammal scents and hair and imperfections, does this sound gross? It is not,  do not be ashamed being a friendshipual creature who wants to attract a mate for love and children.

If you want to look good, lay off the perfumes that are in ever product. I rarely use deodorant and I am an athletic guy.  I simply use natural soap, eat tons of yogurt.

Skin care how to look good

Try to give your facial skin a break from all perfume and make up also,  maybe use some natural cosmetics, like from L’Occitane.

Want a cheap beauty treatment, take a bath with a honey mask. Just buy honey and read a book in the bath. really coat that honey on your face.

Let your skin breathe. Nothing looks unhigh as a women with makeup caked on.  If you have a little acne, so what. Let your skin breathe and be clean.  Guys do not mind girls with acne in my experience. Sound radical? I am a guy, why would I lie?  If you have any other problem with your skin or face it is most likely in your mind. Really, I have seen girls with all kinds of skin problems but it did not affect them when if they want to attract a guy.

Spend money at a place like Whole foods or Bodyshop vitamin c 10% cream, rather than your off the shelf cream from some cosmetic company, even the best ones.  I do no think they do anything. I have tried them all. But when I came back from the states and used some stuff I bought at Whole foods, people I make comments how my skin had changed.  With any product to date by a cosmetic company, nothing has done anything.

If you wan to get crazy just try some red lipstick. Men like it.

Beauty diet – diet to look beautiful

Do not eat in restaurants or things in boxes and cans and bags.  I live in Europe and I only buy from local farmers market or at least nothing in packages.  I can not believe in the USA everyone is eating at restaurants and food in packages.  In Europe, I almost never go out to eat and my wife cooks soap from scratch almost everyday.  Take vitamins and eat a natural diet. You do not have to be a vegetarian, not at all, just no instant, prepared  food.

Do not read too may diet books.  They all say the same.  I know I used to work in a few bookstores and on Saturday night when there were no customers I read them all.  They say, be moderate, eat vegetable and fruits. I try not to eat mammals and junk food and only drink water or  100% juice.  Besides that I like French, Italian , Polish, Japanese cooking. It is whatever you like as long as it is not junk.

Since I am not a girl I will never full understand why girls obsess over sweet, sticky, sugary things. I know it is connected to estrogen etc. That being said do no deny yourself all day, just be cool about your sweet fixations. Once in a while Eat natural ice cream.  My wife makes it for us, or the good stuff you get in a shop, not brand X. Do not obsess over cookies, cakes and pies and all the things girls feed themselves with because they do not have a cordial guy around to rock their world and turn it upside down. Do not buy them or bring them in the house.

You want to eat junk,  then do not blame me if you do not find your prince. Sweets are for your guy to buy you, not for you to buy for yourself.  Do you understand that.  If you have no guy, do not be chowing down on cakes alone. Wait until you have your prince and he takes you out for ice cream. A lot has been research about how to be enchanting and gorgeous based on scientific ratios for the body. For example this body of research suggests ratios for hip to waist and leg length, beautiful body.  However, I think it comes down to being thin.

Fitness and beauty

It is simple, I do not have a car. When I was in the USA on vacation people said the store is very far away, like a 20 minute walk.  Uh mm in Europe I walk like 45 one way to go to the shop I like and it is no big deal.  I think you can either be a walker or an aerobics/gym slave, I prefer the former. And if you work out like 45 minutes on the treadmill or step class, it  is nothing. Live an active lifestyle by walking.

The female body and attractiveness

Some guys like big chest and some like small, but most guys do not care. Noses some guys like little and small, but most guys like a little bigger, it looks ethnic.  Do not worry what your body looks like. Look at Madonna, she has short legs but she made it one of her biggest assets.

Make your self perceived weakness and turn it into your trademark your point that guys will look at you and say, wow she does not look like every other girl on the street with a little nose that goes up.  Dare to be yourself. You can look like whatever, as long as you are thin. If your corpulent, all bets are off. Keep your hip to waist ratio at about .8.  If you have that, you will not look good you will be a beautiful woman. Guys like thin girls. Nothing more needs to be said.

What about meditation and all that for looking good

What about the mind-body thing and its affect on beauty and looking good? Yes it is true, after a certain age we are all responsible for the looks on our own face. But again, do not think about it, just live your life. I love yoga and it is a great workout. I have meditated on an off.  However, I do not do these things now. You do not need to change your religion or read too many new age things to look good. Keep it simple.  I am Catholic. I go to church and believe in the Bible and keep a positive attitude and smile. I forgive and forget. I thank God everyday for whatever God gives me. Keep it simple, be humble. If you have an issue with your faith in God, read Hans Kung’s book ‘Does God exist’.  You do not have to change your life to be beautiful, just keep doing what you love to do, have faith and trust in the others and what you believed before all this neurotic existential doubt and worldly cynicism or political correctness, creeped in.  Be a light for others in this world. Negativity makes you ugly.

Are you lonely and want to attract a guy

Travel to Europe or study languages. Your will go from a 4 to an 8 in terms of attractiveness.  Men like girls who are smart and cultured. No money? No problem, work and save and go to Europe and rent a cheap flat.  I did many times. One time I got a $100 dollar ticket to London, hitch hiked around Europe and lived on French bread, many months in Europe all-inclusive was about 500 dollars.

European guys like American girls.  Would you not find it attractive is some French guy moved in next to you? Same goes for Europeans. I live in Eastern Europe, you do not have to go to over priced western Europe, Eastern Europe is more like Europe use to be.

What about clothes for looking good?

Tight jeans, designer white t-shirt sun glasses and long hair and a nice body (size 4 or 6 or maybe 8 at most). No guy will be able to resist you.

Dresses are always better than pants. Black clothes look great. Simple is better. If you do not like your legs because you are afraid you have spider veins, guys are not looking at your legs like this. If you are really worried wear black or white or orange stockings even fish net.

Simple clothe and thin body (not too thin, but lets say size 6, whatever your age is).

What attitude are men attracted to?

Humble and idealistic. Stop reading Jane Austen and live it. If you want a prince be a princess. Do not be sassy, aggressive or materialistic. Boring, clichés. Be humble. Tell a guy you love to cook. Learn to cook. Say your sorry all the time and mean it. I do. Don’t you want your partner to be unconditional in love and understanding? Than be the same. Be humble. If guys use you, God sees everything, just move on. Remember your goal is to attract a made not be hip and cool.  Be a sweet loving humble beautiful princess.  This is what is cordial.

If you like classical literature, travel and languages this increases your attractiveness. Brains is appealing. Women who are gossipy and hang out with the girls and talk about popular culture and small things is not appealing. Girls that are into classical things like art and ballet and literature are attractive to guys.

Girls night out is so unattractive for a man. A man wants a domestic girl just like a girl wants a man who is not partying with his buddies. Most, umm all the girls I know in Europe tell me straight out they are domestic.  This is a big turn on for guys.

Humble, and idealistic religious but also slightly neurotic and artistic. I think the humble and idealistic part is the only important thing, everything else follows.  Don’t you want a prince?  Well get your nose out of those harlequin romances, because guys want a princess.

You can be slightly neurotic if you want, but if you start talking like you do not need a man or career is important to you than you have just turned off most guys.  I am a guy, buzzing with testosterone and competitiveness, aggressiveness, intelligence and ambition, just buzzing with it, and I do not care about career. I love my family. I love my wife and daughter and just want to be with them and make them happy.  Is there anything wrong with a woman wanting to make her husband happy.  This should be your goal.  This is attractive to a man.

How to look good

• Be a skinny and thin girl to be attractive.
• Wear tight jeans and designer t-shirts.
• Grow your hair long and do not color or perm it.
• Natural perfumes and cosmetics only and lightly,let your skin breath and your pheromones work.
• Walk everywhere.
• Do not eat prepared food.
• Study languages and travel the world, make yourself interesting, this is attractive.
• Do not be a corporate slave or worry about anything other than developing your mind and soul and finding your husband so you can have a family and stay with him and make him happy your whole life and never leave him. However, he must believe in love without limits like you and  have saintly patience and humility also. Career women are so unattractive as are hopeless men who hang out with the guys. Be all or nothing with your love.
• Be thin. I know I said this but if you want to look good be a skinny girl.
• Have faith and trust in God.

If you take these to heart more or less you will be as attractive or more than any model or actress. Let me know what your reaction is to my post on how to be beautiful and attractive. It is more important to be attractive than beautiful. However with my ideas you will be both.

I want to recant my experience with a few Russian girls in Moscow a few years back. It was one of the most interesting but also humiliating conversations I have had.  However, there was a lesson behind all this.  Further, I will tell what a Rusalka is.

Only date a Russian who 100% supports Ukraine, as this is an unjust and unprovoked operation, and you do not want to date a morally questionable person.

Types of Moscow girls

The purpose of this is to convey what exactly you might run into with Russian girls who are not the sweet farmer’s daughter from the village working in marketing or the PhD student in linguistics in Siberia attending Moscow university but rather your garden variety of Moscow girl who wants to play the foreign guy and sees you as a meal ticket. It was deemed yet worth retelling.

I think if you are a guy, the point of going to Russia is not to play, but rather to meet a girl who is serious about the possibility of love and marriage.

My Moscow apartment and first evening in Moscow

I was staying in an apartment on Ozerkovskiy. Your typical tacky post Soviet Union, remodeled apartment with a cheesy dark green velvet coach.

Although I had been to Moscow before, I asked the guy who set up the apartment some recommendations where I could meet some girls in Moscow.  He told me in the back page of the classified section.  I told him not those kind of girls. He wrote down a couple of clubs – ‘discos’ as they are refereed to in Eastern Europe.

I went to a Russian kiosk, the type that at 10 pm at night sells everything you would ever need, from metro tickets to green poo-in-one cheap Russian shampoo with sparkles or DVD of movies from the 2005.

I bought a cell phone card with a number and loaded it up. I highly recommend you do the same if you are in Moscow or any foreign city on the prowl.

The first night I went to sleep as I was pretty tired. However, before this, I had a kebab near the local metro station. I wanted to scoped out to get my bearings so in the morning, I would be fresh and awake and ready for anything. I actually talked to a girl in line in Russian just to practice.  She was showed some interest but rather would not go for the first girl I meet.

Garden variety of Russian girl players

I was quite jet-lagged and was up at 4 am.  I thought of going to hit some clubs and maybe meeting some girls, but I think the quality would be low and did not want to employ the last man standing strategy as my intent was to meet some nice Moscow girls.

Latter that day about 7 pm after doing some site seeing as my apartment was close to the Moscow river and the historic district, I meet a couple of Russian girls. I meet them at the Internet cafe, rather than on the Internet.

I was doing some e-mails telling my friends I made it safe, they were on flirt.ru. I always check to see the sites girls are on in Internet cafes so I know what they are about. Although not the most attractive girls they were dressed with such flare that when they walked into a room. They were designed to attract men.  An men are programmed to respond.

Description:
Russian girl number 1 (classic Rusalka look)
Black with some dark red, straight hair down the back
Blush to extenuate high cheek bone
subtle cat eye make up
short skirt and black leggings
Platform shoes
Pale skin with some freckles

Russian girl number 2
Blondynka hair down to the small of her back
a couple of sparkles on her face
red lipstick
T-shirt with a sassy ‘Girls can’t what?” written across the front.
Jeans that were painted on
pumps
Sun tanned

I did not want to seem to forward so after chatting them up a bit, I got their names, The dark haired one was Svetlana and the blond was Yulia (what a surprise). I gave got Svetlana’s number and told them I might be in Moscow again and if I was I would sms them.  I did not want to sound to desperate.

Where to meet Moscow girls

After about a week of being the foreigner in Moscow, I hit a number of the popular ‘diskoteks’ like Пропаганда (Bolshoi Zlatoustinskii Pereulok 15) which is good on a Thursday night but pricey. Also City Space at wissotel Krasnye Holmy, 52 Kosmodamiansky Embankment if anyone wants to know where to go. However, with a stroke of luck I bumped into the above to mentioned rusalki.

Meeting the Rusalki

What are Rusalki (plural form)?  A Rusalka is a  Russian girl from Slavic mythology. A temptresses that feeds off energy of the living, men can not resist them Rusalki usually live in forest and appear thin, pale with dark red hair and green eyes.  Once draw in, they drain men of life energy, energetic vampires if you may.  Maybe Дневной дозор by Sergei Lukyanenko is not too far off base.

One of these Москва Rusalki must have lived in the blocks close to my flat or there would have been no way I could have seen them again in such a large city. On the other hand they were not hard to spot.  They were dressed the second time I saw them was as follow:

Russian girl number 1 (Svetlana – classic Rusalka look)
Jet black with some red color, straight hair down the back
Blush to extenuate high cheek bone
suitable cat eye make up
Short skirt with white leggings
Platform shoes
White skin with a couple of freckles

Russian girl number 2 (Yulia)
Blondie hair down to the small of her back
a couple of sparkles on her face
red lipstick
T-shirt with a sassy ‘Girls can’t what?” written across the front.
Jeans that were painted on
pumps
Sun tanned

That is basically the same outfit they had last week. I do not know if it was because they were stuck on look or really were poor student types.

Moscow Rusalki women versus GQ ex-pats

I saw some ex-pat American guys, very GQ looking, but fortunately for me also more green at the Russian girl game than me.  Maybe they were living in Moscow or consultants, but they must have not assimilated too well.  I image they spend most of their time at the Irish pub or other expat hang outs watching ‘the game’ on some plasma screen TV, rather that chatting up Moscow girls and learning Russian.

They were chatting them up my Moscow girls and buying them drinks.  They thought they were making progress.  They were not, they were just buying them drinks.

When they left I left no time go right for them, as every guy in the club was waiting for their chance to go right for them like moths flying into the light.

When I got to them first, I was getting a lot of looks from the other patrons. I thought out of jealously, but maybe the locals knew something I did not about these girls.

Rusalki Moscow girls conversation

The conversation progressed as follows:
After some small talk I determined the Blondie spoke better English (Yulia) and I did not want to reveal I knew the Russian language, as I could meet the conversation between them if need be.

Yulia: My friend is very beautiful, yes?

Admin: I said yes very (I was lying of course, she was attractive but so are many girls in Moscow).

Yulia: Do you like my friend?

Admin: I do not know, your friend but would like to.

Yulia: Beautiful girls need beautiful things, yes?

Admin: I guess.

Yulia: There is women’s shoe shop down the street maybe you want to take her shopping there sometime.

Admin: Maybe, if she was my girl but first I need to get to know her.

Yulia: My friend does not get to know just any guy, she is top model.

Admin: Really? (mild sarcasm, Svetlana was pretty and tall and thin, but the top model was hard to believe, maybe a model of some sort).

Yulia: She only had one boyfriend before.  She has a boyfriend now. But she likes you.

Admin: I like Svetlana, but do not know her (I guess her tactic was to impress me and bring some sort of exclusivity into the picture).

Yulia: This is good, you can take her shopping, Yes?

Admin: Look I do not want to take your friend shopping, I just want to get to know her as a person.

Yulia: {She just gives me a sly look}

Yulia: I am engaged to man from Alabama. He paid for me to meet him in London, it cost 3000 dollars that trip.  Is that a lot of money for you?

Admin: I said not really. (I was lying again but want to start turning the tables).

Yulia: He will take me to Alabama and I will live there with him, he lives in suburbs of Mobile, Alabama.

Admin: Lucky guy and Lucky you, your just going to love the Alabama countryside, it is a lot like Moscow.

Yulia: I think  American girls will not like me as they are corpulent and will be jealous.

Admin: I think your right.

{at the point the conversation was getting ridiculous.)

Yulia: I can see you are a nice man, maybe even a prince, will you buy Svetlana some shoes now?

Admin: Look, what are you her manager?

{out of the blue Svetlana speaks, I was both shocked and delighted}

Svetlana:  Will you help me learn English?

Admin: Sure.

Svetlana: English lessons cost 50 dollars a lesson in Moscow.

Admin: I can help you learn English, as I am an English teacher, but I am not giving you money to take language lessons from someone else, comprende vous?

The conversation continued for a while after and even got worst.  I bought them drinks, which I never do with girls, but I did it on my way out and left.

We latter exchanged an SMS or two and when I got back to Boston I got this long rambling e-mail from her blond friend about how Svetlana needed money. ‘Svetlana wants 1,300 dollars to finish her university and a prince like me would surely help her. She knows that you are some kind of prince’.

She said she need the money to bribe her professors to pass her courses.  This is the way it works in Moscow and she would not pass unless she go this money.  It was an interesting and slightly plausible story, but no way, they could just be working guys all over the globe, me being one of many.

I told her if she wanted to work on some of my websites I would pay her a few dollars an hour.  I did  not get a reply as working for money would be too hard I am sure, at least that kind of work for these Moscow girls.

I replied next time I am in Moscow she can come to my apartment and we can talk about it {Of course I had no intention of dropping a dime on this one}. I also suggested, if she wanted to go on vacation with me somewhere I might flip the bill. Even that was out of the question really, I was just playing with her at this point.  I am not a player.

The irony is Svetlana looked like a nice girl and if I could of wiggled her away from her ‘manager’ friend I might have had a chance to get to determine what this girl was all about.  I think the issue was her English was not great and her friend was a player.

I am a romantic that believes in love and marriage only. I do not like men or women that are players.  Players hurt people’s feelings.  Hurting a person’s feelings is one of the worst things you can do.

However, I retold this story only because there are some valuable lessons.

Lessons from this experience pertaining to women from the CIS – that is ex Soviet girls

What is the take away from all this?

• Moscow girls and money – Any normal Russian girl would never mix money and love together.  Girls that say I want a little of both, drop them like a bad habit. Love is all or nothing, not a mix of money and love. Not a balance of love and money. Love and only love, it makes the world go around.
• Learn Russian for step one with a Russian lady -Learn Some Russian if you are going for Russian girls.  I know a reasonable level of Russian, I am better with Polish and it makes a huge difference between being seen as just some green ex-pat or tourist swinging through town and someone with a real interest in Russia. If you read some articles from a respected source about Moscow or Russia you will be better off checking an encyclopedia.  Russian girls love their country and do not want to be exported abroad by some Okie from Skokie.
• Moscow women are won by imagination – Russian girls go for guys that excite their imagination, not brawn. Muscovite women (in Russian Moskvich) prefer sensibility not sense.  Don’t you? Don’t you prefer some cordial girl full of imagination and spice and life, than some rich girl who is going to live a boring life shopping in the suburbs at Ann Talyor and the Gap? You want someone who makes your heart skip a beat when they come into the room. Well here is the news, so do they and the way you do that is appeal to their imagination.
• No fake girls – Do not go for girls who look like they just came from the solarium or work in a nail boutique. What is on the outside is often on the inside.
• With any girls, when looking for love and marriage – Try to sift the wheat from the chaff early so you do not waste time. Only go for girls that have have a humility about them.  I used to think  if I worked on a girl I could teach her humility, it was a waste of time.  Girls either have it or they do not.  There are lambs and wolves in this world, know who you are dealing with early.

Let me know what you think about my Rusalki Moscow girl story and what your experiences are with Moscow girls. If you have any question about dating or trying to date Eastern European girls let me know.

The answer to the question “should I get married?” is the most important answer of your life. There is an answer to this question.  The answer is actually very simple.

‘The future enters into us, in order to transform us, long before it happens.’

If you or your partners are thinking you will ‘give it a try’, I would say no.  Do not get married.

If you and your partner say, we will stay together not matter what.  No conditions, no escape hatch, no 1% chance, no cheating, no ‘well she cheated on me’, no ‘he is mentally ill’ or ‘verbally abusive’,’ needs to change’ etc.  No girls night out, guys night out, but really 100% together day and night no conditions and no limits then get married. Love is unconditional and complete in itself.  Marriage is not out of date.

Society can go to h_ll and everyone can be making reasons like he cheated or she was verbally abusive, but you know what, marriage is about staying together no matter what.

Otherwise, just be boyfriend and girlfriend and do not lie to each other at the alter and in front of people. It is all fake.

Otherwise, just be a player.  Accept your corpulente as an aging old maid or a corporate dragon lady. If your a guy be a player going to the disco chasing girls who could be your daughter.

Children and marriage

Every person I know from a single parent home is messed up (studies will back me up on this).  The parents make rationalization like it would be worst if we stayed together.  These are very selfish people.  Very self centered egotistical people.  Children need stable homes and two parent. If you think you should get married to fill the empty void in your life because you can hear your biological clock ticking loud as big ben or you have been chasing the corporate cheese,  you lose.

Others around you who live humble poor lives are happy and married.

Should I get married – will I ever get married?

The other side of the question “should I get married” is “will I ever get married”? If you are true to your ideals you will find your ideal lady friend or groom.

I have been married for a while now and with my wife longer.  Since I mostly work at home with her, we are together 24 hours a day.  I further know other couples like this, small business owners, Mom and Pop shop owners and they are together 25 and 50 years now and together 24 hours a day and happy.  Its not a big deal.  If you love someone you want to spend your life with them.

I am 100% man.  However, I have no desire to have a drink with my buddies, or do anything but spend it with my wife.

I go shopping with my wife and she cooks dinner for me and cleans the house etc.  Its very easy.  I always say I am sorry 100% and am sincere and so does she.  No stress at all.

You can have your ideal but the person has to be the right person.

Should I get married? Warning signs

• If you or your partner’s career is important – do not get married.  You spouse has to be number 1.  I would work at McDonalds if I had to.
• If you hang out with your friends and will miss them during marriage – do not get married.  Just have a girl friend.
• If your partner criticized you or talks about you negatively to others, no question do not get married.  You should be her hero.
• If money is an issue, such as prenuptial agreement – or want to keep things with money separate do not get married.
• She does not have wisdom.  What is widsom?  Humility, forgiveness, understanding, loyalty, God in her life, not some new age Americanized spirtuality but really has the love of God in her heart.  This is wisdom.  Does she have wisdom?  If not you know the answer to the question to “should I get married?”.
• She is not cordial.  If you are not attracted to her on a primitive level find someone else.   Sure looks fade but there is a lot to be said for finding someone for you.

False warning signs – Should I get married

• She runs away from you or hates you during the dating phases.  This is actually very normal.  Girls test guys subconsciously.  Usually the cordialter the girl is the more they test.  What they are looking for is a prince to rescue them from their fears.

“Our greatest fears are like dragons guarding our hearts deepest treasures, waiting for us to be bold and beautiful’

• She is emotional and a mess.  No problem, most women are pretty emotional, the question is are you captain of the ship and sail the ship through ever storm and bring it to the warm pacific islands.

Should I marry and American women?

If you have to, I guess you can. However, women from Asia, Europe (Eastern Europe), Africa, the Middle East, South America are a zillion times nicer, more beautiful, cultured, less materialistic, cordialter and most important wiser than American women.  Sure, American women are easier, but we are talking about love and marrage and the American girls is basically a very poor choice for marriage as her head si pumped with so much modern liberal ideas that even if she says one thing, there is a better than 50% chance you will be wrong.

If you marry a foreign girl in America the chance is less than 15% you will get divorce compared to 60% with an American girl. Do not be a fool.  American girls have enjoined the top of the food chain status and do not deserve it because they lack the courage to stay in their marriage without making excuses.

Men too cheat and hang out with the guys yes I know, but in the States, it is rare I find loyal, stay at home, happy to cook and please their husband women.

It is sick, that marriage has come down to a partnership of balancing career.

Marriage and career the balance

No balance between marriage and career.  Love is all or nothing.

I live in Poland.  Not long ago there was only vinegar on the shelves and nothing else.  No food, no paper, no coal,  to warm people’s home, people lived in 300 square feet flats with 3 families. People stayed married.  I went to the village where my grandparents are from in Ukraine they have no water, 80 year old women have to carry it from a well.  People there are married and happy. American are so spoiled. Any American that talks about career should not get married.

What if you husband is an unemployed bum?  So what?  I never married my wife because of her earnings to bring money in.  Love is not about that.  I just do not see people get divorced in Poland.  They stay together and make it work.  No running to a shrink when times get rough.

Girls do not have war parties cutting down their men. People do not take happiness pills.  People here humbly work out their lives.

Should I get married?

If you believe like I do, that love and marriage is forever and no exception, and that you humbly and with patience grow together, run to the alter and  get married. It will be best choice of your life.  Marriage is pure happiness and fun.  It actually is like the movie “family man” but better.

If you are not this idealistic or more then the answer to the question should I get married is no.

I would be very interested in hearing from your experiences with marriage or love and this question, should I get married.

Citizenship though marriage, how do I enter the EU or US?

To enter the EU or or the US you have to set up a plan before you get married. The process is similar for visas and citizenship  in both Europe and the US. Just because you are married to a citizen, does not mean anything. Just because you have the intention of marrying a citizen it also does not mean anything. Disclaimer, I am not an immigration lawyer some anything written here is nothing more than what I know, which could be wrong.

I have a dual citizenship. I got this citizenship based on jus soli in the USA and in the EU by jus sanguinis not citizenship though marriage, however, I am married. I do know something about these things as my friends and I have all gone through some parts of the process personally.

As a general statement the most important things is the marriage licenses.  Everything else, temporary visas etc can be worked out.  They are just paperwork and nothing to be afraid of or intimidated by, do not be scared. Go to the embassy and get the facts and the documents.  If you love someone you can do paperwork, do not complain about the process or think they are unfair.  The law is the law for everyone and we all need to abide by the law and the process.  If you need help get a lawyer to help you.

• You need to file a K-1 fiance visa to enter into the U.S. to marry a U.S. citizen. Your United states citizen fiance needs to file Form I-129F.
• In the EU the process is the same but the forms are different for each country, therefore I do not list them, they are basically a fiance visa, every country has one.
• My point is nothing is automatic, it needs to be approved though an immigration application for a visa. These visas are temporary. If your marriage is real then do not worry.  If it is false you are subject to arrest.

Can I apply for a US or EU green card before getting married?

No, marriage documents must be translated and presented and given in addition to birth and other vital documents before you can apply for a visa for the US or the EU. Therefore, green card visa or citizenship by marriage requires a series of applications processes that all start with a valid marriage certificate to a citizen of the country you want to enter.

How long is the non immigrant visa good for?

A non-immigrant visa that is valid for the waiting period, however, in some countries in Europe that are trying to restrict false marriages for citizenship, I have herd that the non immigrant visa is shorter than needed.

How soon can I work after I get my green card application which I got by marriage?

In the USA about 90 days after a partition has been filed. The EU it depends on the country.

Green cards though marriage are only temporary?

Yes, there is a trial period. Further, you are not a citizen and do not have the full rights of a citizen.  If say after two years they find the marriage was not in good faith then they can deport you or arrest you.

The good news is there is rarely an language requirement for citizenship in most countries.  If you have a real marriage, and they check your neibhoors etc, then you have nothing to worry about.

Is citizenship by marriage permanent

Yes unless you lied on your application, in which case you can be deported or arrested.  Once you are a citizen you are a naturalized citizen though marriage.

The whole process in the US is faster than the EU.  The EU could take ten plus years, in the US I think about five years or less.  Why the difference? Because of the bureaucratic processes and different complex laws. The US has more immigration lawyers I think who know how to work the system. In Europe there is sometimes no way to speed up the process as the government works slower.  Even if the laws on the books say one thing, the processes are so back logged it might take forever.

How hard is marriage?

Easy, both the process and being married.  The process, you can get married in Vegas in a wedding chapel with just your passports basically as the marriage licenses in some states are easy.

Being married is a lot of fun.  But if you are an egotistical person or can not humble yourself to your love, than why get married? You will  only cause the both of you unhappiness.  However, if you have humility and submissiveness in your heart than marriage will be fun.  You need to submit the ‘I’ to the ‘us’. No exceptions to this rule or law of marriage.

My thoughts on citizenship by marriage

I believe in marriage.  I believe to get married and have a family is a gift.

One of the rewards of falling in love with someone from another country is a dual citizenship.  However, this should never ever come into play in the love equation. However, I know many international couples and they are very happy, I am one of them. I and my wife in our hearts are truly deeply in love and will stay together our whole lives no matter what or where we live. It does not matter, rich or poor or anything.  Marriage is about love.

False marriage  for citizenship is a sin.  Why would you sell you self for a citizenship.  Why would you pay someone to try to get married for a citizenship to the EU or US?  You might say oh, it is for work or a job, but that translates to money.  You are lying for money.  To lie is against the law and God’s law.  Therefore, call it like it is, you sell your body for money.  You lie to get a citizenship by marriage.

I understand life is hard.  I really do.  However, marriage is sacred.  If you are so clever, use your creative talents in a positive way, rather than a criminal way.

I believe if you are smart you can make money almost anywhere you live. You must have the right attitude and believe in yourself.

Many lives I have heard of lives destroyed by citizenship by marriage.  I knew one girl who I think got married for a US citizenship.  Her false husband used her and destroyed her life.  I have herd of other girls who when the guy got citizenship though marriage the guy disappear and the girls could not get divorced, therefore could not get remarried.

I have herd of women that play also, and get assets and attachment of wages on the man’s income for is money.

I have a few other posts that pertain to citizenship mostly to the EU. I invite you to look through these as there is a lot of information in these posts in a question and answer format in the comments section. If you do leave a comment I will try to answer it but this advise is not legal, rather just for fun.  However, on any comments please use proper punctuation and grammar on my citizenship through marriage post, thank you.

I picked up my EU passport via a Polish dual citizenship yesterday. Even though myphotowas not super I am happy. I had citizenship just did not meet the passport.  I am also a US citizen.  Many people ask me about the question of dual citizenship.

Rules of Dual citizenship

The rules of dual citizenship are quite easy to understand. Most countries neither deny or recognizes dual citizenship.  However, if you are a dual citizen you must enter the country with the country’s passport you own.  Therefore, as an American I must enter the US on my USA passport and the EU on my EU passport.  Why?  Because, the passport you enter determines the rules you will follow.

If I enter the USA on my Polish passport, which I am not allowed to do anyway, I would be a Polish citizen in the USA. I must enter on my US passport and I am subject to the laws of the USA and can not go crying to Poland if I get in trouble.  Is this clear? You use your both your passports and must enter on the right passport, that is where you are a citizen.

Dual citizenship and taxes

What about taxes?  Very easy and clear,  as a USA dual citizen I am responsible for US taxes forever, not matter where I live or if I am a dual citizen.

The US government does not care. Yes this is true.  Just because you have dual nationality the US tax office does not care.  If you make 1 dollar in Siberia this must be reported along with all your bank accounts.  I report to the US government and Polish government  my pittance of teaching earrings I make in Poland teaching English. I must report all investments and bank accounts. However, most countries have treaties.  The US will allow about a 90k exclusion on foreign income earned.

Which is a lot of money at least for me, so most people reading this do not have to worry.  However, income in my US bank accounts I must pay interest on regardless as it is domestic income and the same rule applies for Polish income I have to report it to the Polish government. You should combine your world wide income and report it. You can not and should not hide anything.

Benefits of dual citizenship

Above  is the worst part of being a dual citizen and most do not have to worry about it. Besides feeling like Jason Bourne or an International man of mystery, the best part is I get to live anywhere in Europe or American without a second thought about visas. I also get to work basically anywhere I want, the USA or in the EU as I am a “dual citizen”.   This makes life very easy for me and my family.  Further my family is a dual citizen so if I have children they can study in the EU or the USA and work anywhere.  It makes life very interesting.

How to get a dual citizenship

Most people looking for dual citizenship are American looking to connect with their roots.  The EU goes by blood or birthright jus sanguinis.  This is in contrast to the US which goes by jus soli or by place of birth.

If you parents are citizens then you will be.  It does not matter where you are born.  However, if you are born in the EU it does not mean you will get citizenship.

Grandchildren get special treatment, but citizenship is not confirmed rather it is obtained through nationalization in most countries.  So if your grandparents came from Poland for example, you can apply for naturalization but usually can not automatically get confirmed.  I do not want to go into the law as it is very complex. However you ca ask question and maybe I might know. A lawyer can help but they are pricey.  The law is the law, if you know it and apply you can get it.  I do not think there are any loopholes.

I had a lawyer and I knew more than he did about the law.  Really, I did it my way and got two citizenships.

The best place to check the law is at the consulate of your country you want to apply for double citizenship for.  You need to apply.

What do you need for dual citizenship?

• All documents translated by an official translator in the official language of the country.
• Birth certificates, marriage certificates, no exceptions.
• Official statement from your country that you are free from obligations of money or law.  That is you are good standing.
• Visa for the current country.
• CV and other qualitative statements proving you will be a positive good citizen. Sometimes there is a language requirement. It does not hurt to learn the language to some level.
• Police checks
• Judge and court approval
• Application for citizenship.

This is similar in all countries.

Time for dual citizenship

Count on about ten years.  Forget some express marriage stunt.  Live in the country and work and apply and maybe you will get it.

My brother after 20 years of living in the UK got his citizenship. Perhaps he could have got it sooner but I guess he did not apply.  But he worked under a work visa then green-card.

What about citizenship through marriage?  That can be another post as it is a different type of citizenship application process.

Other citizenship considerations

Some exceptions to dual citizenship are countries like Ukraine.  They do not allow dual citizenship but you know, what they do not know will not hurt them some people say. But I would double check this before I took a chance.

I think countries like Italy,the Netherlands and Ireland have and perhaps the easiest dual citizenship laws. Immigration laws and nationality are always sensitive issues as the whole world wants to live in Europe and America.  Maybe not the whole world but a lot of it wants to get a work visa.

If you are looking to get entrance to the US or EU for work from a Middle Eastern or African or Asian country I think you have a harder time now than say an American.  Even though the law is the law, the EU has been flooded with Eu applicants and false marriages from the third world so the police and government does double checks on many people aspiring for EU citizenship.

My dual citizenship quest for jus sanguinis

I first came to Poland in 1999 and in 2009 I obtained my dual citizenship.  I had Polish family, and in theory was a dual citizen, just not confirmed on paper. Then I got married lived here for many years to and EU citizen, I am still married and will be forever.  I applied and waited and worked legally and did positive things for Poland. I also learned the language . But still look how long it took.  So if you think you can just waltz into the EU with a marriage, think again.  I knew a guy it took 19 years before he was citizen.  Things have changed.  I guess because I was an American and my family came to the USA with Polish passports it was easier, well over ten years latter.

But if you are looking for a wife for citizenship it is not legal and I would think again.  Marriage is sacred.  God sees all.  You might rationalize it that you are doing it for work or money, but you can rationalize any crime like this.  Marriage is sacred and forever.

If anyone has questions or comments about dual citizenship please let me know. However, please writing in full sentences without chat style, that is use proper punctuation and spelling.

I think the benefits far outweigh the trouble so if you are patient and honest why not apply for dual citizenship.

The purpose of this post is to recommend how to find a wife. That means literally what countries I recommend for finding a lady friend and those I do not.  However, the more important part of this post on how to find a lady friend is about how to find the qualities in a gal what would make a good wife for you.  Yes you want a nice little wife who will make me happy. If you are shocked by the truth or faint of heart, proceed with caution in reading.

Who is this post for? Primarily single men looking for a wife. However, girls married men etc, I invite feedback.  If you combine the questions what and where, this will get you to how to find a wife. You need to be a chooser.  That is make  conscious choices to avoid women who are troubled my their own inflated ego and pride. These are no princesses.

Take your time please and read this post and consider that I say.  Review the different pages of my website.  If you do not have time, book mark the site and come back and explore these two parts of my post.

• What is a good wife
• Where to find a good wife

I really sincerely want you to find the wife of your dreams as she will truly make your life beyond what you could have ever imagined.

If you want to know about me?  Yes I am very happily married to the women of my dreams.

Finding a lady friend – the only way

I will tell you what others do not tell you about “how to get a wife”. I am not going to be politically correct nor chauvinist. I do not sell anything.  I will tell you from a practical stand point the qualities in a women that will make you happy.

I am doing this because I want you do be happy with your life.  Your lady friend will be you happiness or your hearts discontent more than anything else in your life.  Your wife will make you happy or cause misery in your life.  So make sure your marriage partner with wisdom as your guide.

Why not listen to other advice about how to find a lady friend?

If you follow what current society leads you to then you will most likely be unhappy. A lot of what is written about love and dating today are by women or the politically correct.

My purpose is not to offend anyone, rather help those are want to find a lady friend.  I just want to convey in an honest way what my experience in life has led to in terms of finding a your other half.

If you listen to others, new wave people, you will have a hard life, I promise.  In fact, instead of following conventional wisdom and find a liberal professional American girl to marry for example, why not just find someone you despise, give them your house and half your money and save yourself all the trouble of marriage.

How to find a wife – Why I have perspective?

I have traveled the world  many times and have a personal interest in language and cultures. I have lived in many place,  I live in Europe currently. I simply want to help you filter out the mixed messages you receive from the media and popular culture.

I am happily married as are my brothers and father. Their whole life they have been very happy.  I choose my spouse based on high ideals.  I recommend you do to. I have enough world experience to match almost anyone so it gives me perspective. If you disagree let me know. But to find a wife you need to know what to look for.  Trust me, not the media or popular culture.

What a good wife must have to be a good lady friend or you must walk away and forget her without looking back

• Faith in God
• Forgiveness – a good wife might say I am sorry all the time.  I do.
• Believes in fairy-tales – someone who is idealistic about life, if you want a princess you need someone who believes in fairy-tales not some trashy post modern girl. I still read romantic books. If your girlfriend has never read romantic books, I would get a new girlfriend.
• Is irresistibly attractive for you. Find someone who is cordial for you and you are cordial for.  It is biology. You do not to be an alpha guy, those guys are very primitive.  Better is having charm, this is attractive no matter what you look like.
• Believes in you. Is totally impressed by you and your are her one and only hero. Find a lady friend that is looking for a prince or hero to rescue her.
• Believes in being humble and submissive. I will raise some eye brows with this, but it is the truth.  Find a wife who is humble. Love means you submit your ego to your beloved and will to bear all hard things. Anyone who does not humble themselves is not worthy to be called a ‘lover’.
• Find a wife who knows how to cook and clean. A good wife wants to keep her husband happy, what is wrong with this?
• Will be a good mother. More important than any good employee for her boss in her profession is a good mother to her children. Being a mother and a wife is the most important job on the planet. Women lawyers are perhaps the worst choice in finding a good wife for example as they try to balance career and family. Ha ha. Do you not know, family is almost the most important thing? Forget balancing or juggling in most cases these two things.  I would rather live in a 300 sq foot flat with my family than make work my priority.  I live in Poland, people are happy in their family lives with little money and in the USA I see many people who are unhappy with a lot of money.  Make sure your wife puts family first, as you do.
• Is not a spender
• Find a lady friend that does not want to change you. Does not hassle you. Love does not alter which it finds. The worst women is one that says he won’t change.  This is a nightmare twisted woman, get away from this type.
• Believes there is no reason to leave a marriage. Divorce is not an option.  Either you are in forever and swear this before God or you are not.  Marriage is sacred.
• Loves you with all her heart and will all the days of your life.

I think being humble sums all the above up.  She should be grateful to be with you and will spend the rest of her life showing you her gratitude. This is what you look for to find a good partner.

Are you offended by this? I do not care it is the truth if you want to find a wife.

Further as a man it is your responsibility to win her heart and devote your life to love her.  This is love without limits. I expect nothing less from myself than total devotion to my wife.

How to find a good wife – materialistic or fairy-tale it is your choice

Does this sound old fashion? It is not. I have the above qualities so why not look for someone who is similar, when looking for a wife.  If you want to find a princess than be a prince. I think if your reading this post you believe in the above but afraid to get it in your life. You might be afraid to speak it because of political correctness and materialistic screaming at you. Men in American movies are always portrayed as bad and good for nothing, but if you are reading this you know that is not true.  Only in extreme examples are men as bad a portrayed, most of my friends are loving sensitive caring men.

You can have a screaming materialistic or a fairy-tale princess.  It is your choice.

I know many women like this.  Further, they are happy to be this way.
If you are a very loving caring idealistic guy, why do I not deserve the someone who is the same.  I am sensitive and idealistic and chances are so are you.  Do not settle for some corpulent American or UK girl with a tattoo and an attitude.

Which country to find a girl?

What countries are best for long term relationships?

1. Eastern Europe Russia, Belarus, Ukraine, Poland Lithuania, Macedonia, Romania. (I do not recommend Czech girls or Hungarian girls.)
2. Latin America  girls, all of them.
3. Mediterranean countries, Italy, Spain, Greece
4. Middle Eastern girls,  consider countries like Morocco.
5. Asian girls It is another topic and it depends on their culture.  I would say Indian girls are the best for finding your lady friend for marriage.

Basically the whole world besides the USA and the UK. But really, guys take this seriously. Do not just read this post and walk away. Believe me I have been there. I was lonely, depressed and without anyone and I thought it was me. However, it was that my other half my destiny was waiting for me on the other side of the world.

I learned what the expression ‘to dodge a bullet’ means, when I think of all the close calls with American women.

What countries are the worst to find a lady friend.

1. UK
2. USA

I  say the UK is slightly worst then American girls in terms of the worst girls to marry as they lack faith in anything but their own self confidence.  American girls you can find faithful girls, but generally they are also pumped with ego and can not recommend these American girl.  I would say stay away from American and UK girls for any reason.

Why money plays no role in love – not an issue when finding a lady friend

I have herd many ridiculous lawyers and relationship advisor’s talk about protecting your assets before marriage.  I think they are from the devil.  I am sorry.   Love is not about money.  Love is from God.

How to catch a lady friend

1. Ask God for a lady friend.  Really. In your dreams and imagination before you fall asleep ask the universe to lead you to a wife that will be your other half.  Do this and be patient.

Where to find a lady friend?

Read my lips, take a vacation outside your own country and go to the places where women are princesses. If you can not do this you can try the Internet.

Read my girls for love blog and explore the country posts that have that are of interest to you.  I have specific recommendations on websites to find women from these countries.

But my recommendation is travel to a country like Argentina or Russia. The best place to find a girl is to travel to various countries, rent an apartment for a week or month on vacation and just meet girls.  What if you work too much?  Quite your, job take a vacation, whatever you need to do to find your wife. Stay in a cheap apartment somewhere and go out on torus of the city and interact with normal girls.  Take ten of these vacations until your passport is filled with stamps.  Do not have the money? Sell your house and car cash in your 401k.

What is more important having a house and a horrible wife or renting a small apartment and having the women of your dreams.  I mean this.  I was a Boston professional with a top job and I moved to Krakow, Poland and had a small rented flat about 200 square feet and washed my clothes in the sink.  But I now have my princess and am doing fine.  Believe in yourself and your ability to prevail no matter where you are.  Life is an adventure, enjoy the ride.

Do not stay in hotels and travel high class, travel raw budget, conserve your money.  I have hitch hiked and stayed in youth hostels and lived on French bread, its more fun.

Romantic love brings people together that should never be brought together.  Base your choices on wisdom, not pop culture.

I found my princess lady friend

Your dream and vision is a fairy-tale princess. You deserve this.  I found mine and I sometimes joke that I really died long ago and I am really in heaven and I do not know it. Why? Because my wife and I are in heaven since we meet.
Don’t you want the same in your life?

If you have ever wondered does one true love exist? I will lay all the cards on the table, the answer is yes. I have it and know others that also believe that true love exists.

The purpose of this post is to give you an argument about love.  However, not just about love but one true love. The number ‘one’ is an important word in this equation, err well I mean sentence.

This argument is for all you who are left brained and are skeptical if one true love does exist. This post is a little bit tongue and cheek, but nevertheless the logic is valid.

Consider my thesis in this post. However, in the end, perhaps love is a little like faith, for those who do not believe true love exists, no explanation is possible and for those who believe in love, no explanation is necessary.  Or perhaps it is is something you have experience for yourself, it is a gift.  So for all you doubting Thomases out there here goes.

Does true love exist? But what if you do not believe in love?

Love is about is about finding your destiny. Love is unconditional and without limits. Love is not about finding someone that will make your life comfortable, or money, or education or profession or nationality or race or corpulent or skinny. Love is about finding your other half. That is it. There is only one person for everyone.

However, what if you do not believe that there is one love in your life. What if you do not believe in your destiny. In fact, some of my friends do not believe there is one person for everyone. Oh ye of little faith. Indulge me and listen to my reply. OK even if you do not believe there is one person for everyone. Let us look at this from a mathematical perspective.

Setting up a quantifiable, measurable conceptual framework for true love

Lets say that the mutual benefit of love generates something called “love utils”. That is, when two people are together they generate units of love happiness for each other. Let us make the hypothesis that these units are measurable, quantifiable units of happiness.

Therefore, If you are with a girl named Jane then she personally might generate ten units of love happiness for you. However, if you are in a relationship with Sally, then the relationship would yield a robust 12 units of love happiness for you. This is clear.

Even if you do not believe in true love you can understand the idea that some relationships are more or less optimal, the only thing I have done here is added this quantifiable objective measure to it.

In this measure of ‘love utils’ there is calculated and factored the sum total of all things that makes you personally happy. There will be different weights attributed to different factors and components. Each person will have a different utility curve. For example, if one person values intellectual creativity while another person values long legs, your personal love equation factors these components into the ‘love utils’ measurement.

Mathematical optimization – one true love must exist

If you understand the idea of  linear algebra optimization, even if you do not believe in love as some abstract ideal destiny, then the reality is there is one person in the world who will maximizes your ‘love utils’. It is a mathematical fact.  It is an optimization point if you may.

Present value of your true love choice

Now here is the problem, in order for this person to be your destiny they must be the person that would maximizes your units of ‘love utils’ over your whole life.

For example, you could wait to meet a girl in outer Mongolia that will give you 100 units of happiness every year. However, if you do not meet her until you are 98 years old and your expected life expectancy is 100, than you will only get 200 units of love happiness or ‘love utils’ over your whole life. On the other hand, if you meet someone when you are say 25 years old and this person gives you only 5 units of love happiness or ‘love utils’ over your life then you would get 75 * 5 or 375 units of love happiness from this person. Therefore, she is a better choice than the person from outer Mongolia.

Next if you consider in this equation all possible matches, all probabilities of meeting (although determinist do not believe in chance, they are not the ones I am trying to sway as I would be preaching to the choir). You also need to consider of course things like if the girl does not like you, she will not stay as she is also a love maximizer. Everything needs to be factored. Once you understand this and are aware of this than you can not deny there is one person for you on their earth that will make your dreams come true.

Dating burnout or diminishing returns

Further, people will say, ahh but Mark, what about the idea of changing partners and riding the waves of love,  from one romantic high to the next. In the long run this strategy is ineffective for personal happiness as you begin to hit diminishing returns for each new partner.

You experience dating burnout. It is like eating one banana, the first couple are good, but after that, you experience this economic law of diminishing returns.  Further, once you eat too many you might become allergic to bananas like some of my friends who claim they are allergic to love.  Hmm, look them up when they are all alone in their 60s living with a room full of cats still cruising ladys and and see if in their heart they are really happy. This is on par with pitiful girls who claim they do not need love to make them happy.  Sorry about all that, lets get back to the analysis and examine some more naysayers.

I meet many guys who just want to meet a good looking girl who does not hassle them. They do not believe in the fairy-tale called love, ever. And I meet many girls who stopped believing in fairy-tales long ago. However, the truth is both patterns of negative thinking are a fallacy. If you find yourself in one of those camps, I only ask you to yield to the logic of this model.

See even if you are a person who does not believe in one true love, they can not argue with the notion that love is an optimization model. There is one optimal choice for you, when you consider all probabilities and factored weights and expectations in the statistical sense.

You need to consider all factors including such as, imperfect information, the ‘flight factor’ (that is the percentage of risk that she will dump you and run), how much effort it is to be with her, expectations etc. Love is reduced to nothing more than a deterministic equation, on par with an economic optimization model. That is where your marginal cost of being in is equal to your marginal benefit of being in a relationship. Once you find the intersection of those two points you can maximizes your the present value of that benefit over your lifetime, you catch that girl because that is the girl for you.

Conclusion about does one true love exists

You can not argue with math. Even if you are some corpulent drinking guy that watches sports all day and believes nothing about love, you can not argue with the mathematics of my love model. The only conclusion is there really is one person in the world for you. Call it what you want, the ancients called it destiny. Go out there and find your one true love, your other half. Here is my page on love quotes in several languages, I hope they help for your search for true love.

New Polish Visa requirement

If you are on your way to get Polish citizenship, or want o get a Polish citizenship as an entry for the EU, then there is a new requirement you should be aware of.

If you want to stay in Poland as you are waiting for a Permanent visa you need twenty-five Euros a day for every day of your temporary visa.  This is a new law about three weeks ago.

The purpose of this new EU Visa requirement

The point of this rule is twofold. First, they want to make sure you can live in Poland without becoming dependent on your host EU country, that is Poland.

You are a guest and you are not a citizen and should not expect hard working people to support you just because.  Therefore this new Polish visa rule is very reasonable.  I think it takes more than twenty-five Euros a day to live in Poland so it is a very low barrier to entry.

When I applied for my visa for Poland the police reviewed my financial records and so did the city offices.  Now they have just made it more formal.  So it is not against anyone, it is just so you will not fall into trouble when you are in a foreign country in the EU.

The second thing this does is cut down on the number of increasing false marriages to get a visa for Poland.  One-quarter to one-half of the marriages in Poland to foreigners are fake, with the sole purpose of getting an EU citizenship.

This is very wrong.  People use the system and Poland is making it harder and illegal to do so.  If you get caught in some agreement, even if it simply verbal,  you could go to prison. And I think you should.

The foreigner pays some Polish girl ten thousand dollars and she get married he get citizenship and he is off to London.  The Polish girl has money they guy has a EU visa then and EU citizenship.

This is very unfair and very illegal.

Problem with false Polish visas

My parents were technically Polish, my family is Polish ( I am married) I have lived in Poland for about six years, I speak Polish and have worked legally in Poland. To get a Polish citizenship it took me about six year..  This was the fast track because my blood is Polish and under Polish law I am technically Polish, just not confirmed.

One guy from Peru it took him nineteen years.  Therefore, the Polish courts look at every case carefully.  If you are from Ukraine and married to a Polish citizen I think this is not a big deal as Poland and Ukraine share a similar history.

But if you are from Africa or the Middle East they will view your case with care because although some of these guys are sincere, many just want to escape their own countries for some reason.  I have been to Africa and the Middle East and it is beautiful, so I do not understand it.

In fact, many Polish girls are abandoned by their new husbands once they get a Polish visa.  And the Polish girl can not get remarried as the guy is no where to be found for a Polish civil law divorce.

I think this is funny and should teach Polish girls not to enter into such agreements based on money.  Marriage is for love.

New Polish visa law is good

I think this law is good to require on the Polish visa application twenty-five Euros a day.  It should be more.  If you are staying in Poland for One hundred days this means two thousand five hundred Euros you have to prove.

Student Visa for Poland

Student visas of course is different.  They have different rules, laws and regulations.  The above rule is connected to those who want to get a “visa for Poland” through a civil marriage agreement or contract.

If you have question about this issue or citizenship for the EU just ask. I am not an expert or a lawyer but I might know just enough to point you in the right direction.

Relationships succeed for one very simple reason:

• The people are similar in their world view in a radical way.

That is, religious or philosophical ideals that crystallizes their vision of the world and modus operandi in the world, this is  manifest in each person humbles and submits themselves to the other, this is love.

Make a relationship work

Once you get past physical attraction a relationship, which have no illusions about is central, it is really about home much you can let go of ego and pride. I think women often use their looks to get what they want. It does not set a good precedent. The woman has to be irresistible for you, but have the virtues of a prayerful person.

Therefore, to make a relationship work, do not listen to every advice column on the web. Do not even listen to psychologists or your girlfriends. You do not need to take compatibility tests all over the web or check each others signs. All you need is a world view that is the same in a radical way.

How to choose your wife or husband

• What you do need to is ask the other person right in the eye, what they believe about life and the reason we are here. It has to be face to face and honest.

If you or they cannot answer that, or have a divergent view, this is an issue that you have to think about. As you will be spending your life with a person who has a different idea on what life is about. Ask this once you get to know them of course, dating is not a business interview.

Why relationships succeed at first then have trouble

Ego is the opposite of love. Pride always comes before the fall and ego is what causes pride. People are not willing for be submissive. Women today think being a submissive girl is a bad thing. I believe anyone who can not humble themselves and drop their pride everyday can not love and certainly not forgive.

People with pride cannot see their own faults and only find faults in others. Why would I ever want to be in a relationship with a prideful, egotistical girl? Any guy that does not see this does not have wisdom and will be in for a very painful life.

The converse is also true. If a guy does not put love above job, other girls and friends, it is better this guy stays single. I think if a guy is in a relationship he should ideally not even look at other girls. Yes casting your eyes on other girls beside your wife is not the way to live your life.

• I believe in all or nothing.

If you think I am old fashion, I am not, look at my blog and what I write about. I love girls and think women and love make the world go around. Girls are just pure fun.

Why relationships succeed

Relationships succeed because of the similarity of world views in a radical way manifest in actions not words.

• Why relationships succeed – two souls who look at the world in the same direction.
• The reason relationships fail is because ego

Meeting a nice girl or having things in common does not do it for me. I am talking about love.

Love is as if you and the other person are the only two people in the world.

Love is as if it is you and the other person against the world.

Love is all or nothing when it comes to spirit and soul. If you do not believe in this, than do not get married and waste some poor girls time. Go for the real thing, love that will last a lifetime. You have this twin soul who you share your life with, it will succeed.

Why do I know more than others?

• My parents were together for 70 years.
• I have been married happily many years.
• I spend my life studying, life and happiness and no matter what the media tells, you, I am telling you the truth. Love is based on a deep spiritual connection manifest in a fusion of ideals.

What about opposites attracting?

Many people think opposites attract. Maybe physical opposites attract for a while, but moral similarities and general character is what keeps a relationship happy. In fact, you should be two peas in a pod. So similar that you might even look similar. See psychologists have studied this and I believe it. The best relationships are relationships that have the same social, religious, ethnic and educational background. The most important is religious or philosophical ideals.

My relationship

I am American married to a Polish girl. But I am also Polish, catholic and we both have master’s degrees. We have similar world views and interests. We have a lot in common, and I am talking about world views and ideals more than a list of interests you might find on a dating site. Most of our conversation in life is about life and family. Yes we do a lot of fun things together like play chess, homestead and travel but our relationship is about love and God.

In fact, I spend 24/7 with my wife. I work at home as she does and we like to be around each other 24 hours a day.

Some people say, ‘wow’, that is strange. However, my reply is, I think that is they way it always was in history. Man’s evolutionary history was as follows: man and women were be together all the time. It was only in the modern corporate world people are gone 14 hours a day from each other because of work and friends.

The way of all of humanity was you spend your life with your family and your people. You support each other and do not leave the other. Life is about a struggle to exist and perpetual your people and this is done best within the context of a loving relationship centered on God, or at the very least and overriding human ideal.

I believe something eternal and transcendent needs to be the ethos of your relationship. If you let the Divine into this transitory world, miracles will unfold in your life.

How to live happily ever after

If you want a happy relationship find a humble person. Then find someone who you could spend everyday all day and night with.

• Of course be hopelessly attracted to this person.

If you ignore the above then good luck. If you have consider the above than your relationship will be a fairy-tale.

Where is the famous Chakra of Krakow, which often times official tour guides do no like to talk about and many people ask me where is the Chakra of Cracow? It is in the Castle in the court-yard in the East corner.

Here is aphotoclose up of the Krakow chakra. The energy is from deep within the earth and radiates up.

What is the Krakow chakra

There are seven energy plexus in the world, one of them being in Krakow, Poland in the Wawel castle.  It is the second chakra connected with passion and life generation.  It is an inter dimensional portal that has existed before recorded time.  Humans have lived on Wawel hill about 50,ooo year maybe as long as 100,000 years but I think more like 50,000 years at most, this is based on archaeological evidence.

Wawel hill was a center for Pagan worship and mythology with idols along the Vistula river.

I do not believe in all this new age stuff, but I do believe in archaeology and science and religion in the ultimate meaning of the universe.  I think there is a reality  deeper than our brains can perceive.  In fact, like Hegal argued there is a complex stratification of reality.

I point this out as the Chakra of Krakow is interesting and important part of some Eastern Religions.

You can see people meditating and touching it all year around.  So many people are there the walls are worn.

History of the seven Shiva energy stones

The seven places,  chakras, are: Krakow, Rome, Mecca, Delhi, Delphi, Jerusalem,  and Velehrad. This is according to Hindu religion. Look up lord Shiva, he is seen as the transformer.

God caste seven stones into the world and the energy radiates from these points. Some people say studies confirm this.

It would be cool if an inter dimensional time space portal plexus did exist there on Wawel hill.

Energy nexus in Eastern Europe causes mixed reactions

Having an energy nexus in Krakow means something different culturally for someone from Eastern Europe then the USA.  It is because the Eastern Europeans have a love/hate curiosity with anything outside of the orthodoxy of Roman Catholicism. Whereas in other cultures particularly in South America magical and supernatural elements from pre-Christian times are part of their understanding of Catholicism and classified as mystical or spiritual. This is connected to the history and demographics of conversion.

In contrast, a person from Poland is often either more Orthodox, or they reject everything about the church and even arrogantly ironic. In the West, which is a melting pot of ideas because we did not have the experience of communism closing our world for fifty years, there is more of a fusion or dilution, depending on your perspective.

Therefore, the mention of an energy nexus will invoke either total skeptical sarcastic remarks or warnings that this is outside the realm of something that should be discussed or considered.

I personally think it has more of a historical significance than a metaphysical reality. It could be seen as a Jungian thing on a massive world wide scale but I never felt anything when I was there.

However, just because my experience was nothing special, does not mean it is not a reality as there are other people who experience something.

The hill where the Chakras exists is known as Wawel hill (pronounced Vavel and means ravine)) and it was formed in the 25 million years ago in the Miocene epoch and is rich in limestone from the Jurassic Oxfordian age about 160 million years ago.

Archaeological remains indicate there were pre-Slavic cultures and a pagan worship area. Polish culture were relatively late comers.