The answer to the question “should I get married?” is the most important answer of your life. There is an answer to this question. The answer is actually very simple.
‘The future enters into us, in order to transform us, long before it happens.’
If you or your partners are thinking you will ‘give it a try’, I would say no. Do not get married.
If you and your partner say, we will stay together not matter what. No conditions, no escape hatch, no 1% chance, no cheating, no ‘well she cheated on me’, no ‘he is mentally ill’ or ‘verbally abusive’,’ needs to change’ etc. No girls night out, guys night out, but really 100% together day and night no conditions and no limits then get married. Love is unconditional and complete in itself. Marriage is not out of date.
Society can go to h_ll and everyone can be making reasons like he cheated or she was verbally abusive, but you know what, marriage is about staying together no matter what.
Otherwise, just be boyfriend and girlfriend and do not lie to each other at the alter and in front of people. It is all fake.
Otherwise, just be a player. Accept your fate as an aging old maid or a corporate dragon lady. If your a guy be a player going to the disco chasing girls who could be your daughter.
Children and marriage
Every person I know from a single parent home is messed up (studies will back me up on this). The parents make rationalization like it would be worst if we stayed together. These are very selfish people. Very self centered egotistical people. Children need stable homes and two parent. If you think you should get married to fill the empty void in your life because you can hear your biological clock ticking loud as big ben or you have been chasing the corporate cheese, you lose.
Others around you who live humble poor lives are happy and married.
Should I get married – will I ever get married?
The other side of the question “should I get married” is “will I ever get married”? If you are true to your ideals you will find your ideal bride or groom.
I have been married for a while now and with my wife longer. Since I mostly work at home with her, we are together 24 hours a day. I further know other couples like this, small business owners, Mom and Pop shop owners and they are together 25 and 50 years now and together 24 hours a day and happy. Its not a big deal. If you love someone you want to spend your life with them.
I am 100% man. However, I have no desire to have a drink with my buddies, or do anything but spend it with my wife.
I go shopping with my wife and she cooks dinner for me and cleans the house etc. Its very easy. I always say I am sorry 100% and am sincere and so does she. No stress at all.
You can have your ideal but the person has to be the right person.
Should I get married? Warning signs
- If you or your partner’s career is important – do not get married. You spouse has to be number 1. I would work at McDonalds if I had to.
- If you hang out with your friends and will miss them during marriage – do not get married. Just have a girl friend.
- If your partner criticized you or talks about you negatively to others, no question do not get married. You should be her hero.
- If money is an issue, such as prenuptial agreement – or want to keep things with money separate do not get married.
- She does not have wisdom. What is widsom? Humility, forgiveness, understanding, loyalty, God in her life, not some new age Americanized spirtuality but really has the love of God in her heart. This is wisdom. Does she have wisdom? If not you know the answer to the question to “should I get married?”.
- She is not hot. If you are not attracted to her on a primitive level find someone else. Sure looks fade but there is a lot to be said for finding someone for you.
False warning signs – Should I get married
- She runs away from you or hates you during the dating phases. This is actually very normal. Girls test guys subconsciously. Usually the hotter the girl is the more they test. What they are looking for is a prince to rescue them from their fears.
“Our greatest fears are like dragons guarding our hearts deepest treasures, waiting for us to be bold and beautiful’
- She is emotional and a mess. No problem, most women are pretty emotional, the question is are you captain of the ship and sail the ship through ever storm and bring it to the warm pacific islands.
Should I marry and American women?
If you have to, I guess you can. However, women from Asia, Europe (Eastern Europe), Africa, the Middle East, South America are a zillion times nicer, more beautiful, cultured, less materialistic, hotter and most important wiser than American women. Sure, American women are easier, but we are talking about love and marrage and the American girls is basically a very poor choice for marriage as her head si pumped with so much modern liberal ideas that even if she says one thing, there is a better than 50% chance you will be wrong.
If you marry a foreign girl in America the chance is less than 15% you will get divorce compared to 60% with an American girl. Do not be a fool. American girls have enjoined the top of the food chain status and do not deserve it because they lack the courage to stay in their marriage without making excuses.
Men too cheat and hang out with the guys yes I know, but in the States, it is rare I find loyal, stay at home, happy to cook and please their husband women.
It is sick, that marriage has come down to a partnership of balancing career.
Marriage and career the balance
No balance between marriage and career. Love is all or nothing.
I live in Poland. Not long ago there was only vinegar on the shelves and nothing else. No food, no paper, no coal, to warm people’s home, people lived in 300 square feet flats with 3 families. People stayed married. I went to the village where my grandparents are from in Ukraine they have no water, 80 year old women have to carry it from a well. People there are married and happy. American are so spoiled. Any American that talks about career should not get married.
What if you husband is an unemployed bum? So what? I never married my wife because of her earnings to bring money in. Love is not about that. I just do not see people get divorced in Poland. They stay together and make it work. No running to a shrink when times get rough.
Girls do not have war parties cutting down their men. People do not take happiness pills. People here humbly work out their lives.
Should I get married?
If you believe like I do, that love and marriage is forever and no exception, and that you humbly and with patience grow together, run to the alter and get married. It will be best choice of your life. Marriage is pure happiness and fun. It actually is like the movie “family man” but better.
If you are not this idealistic or more then the answer to the question should I get married is no.
I would be very interested in hearing from your experiences with marriage or love and this question, should I get married.