Love, money and women
If this was an IQ test and you see three words: money, girls and love, which one does not go with the others? What is your answer seriously?
Do women go for rich guys, that is men with money? Not in my book. I do not care what some Freudian looking academic will tell you about how women want to marry a millionaire, you can get girls without money. Sure many girls are attracted to a rich guy like a fish to a shiny fishing lure. However, I have had money and I have not and for me it made no difference in terms of attracting girls. And the girls that go for money governed by their appetite desires and reptilian brains are not worthy of you.
American women and money – Many American women have high expectations in terms of men and wealth. They after all are seeking to attract a potential mate and provider. American girls have a reputation of being materialistic. When I use to date a girl like that, I would simply explain, ‘if you marry for money it will be the hardest way to earn it’, and dropped them like a bad habit. Do not let yourself be talked into the American cultural idea that money and marriage and love are connected. They are not. Love and money are never ever connected.
There was a time when I was unemployed and I think I was dating the most women and of the best quality. There was a time when I had a high-powered six figure job and I dated losers.
Personal examples of love for love not money
- When I meet my wife I was unemployed, lived in a 190 square foot apartment and had no car. Oh one more thing, I spend an inordinate amount of time talking about what good price I got on carrot juice. She is a beautiful spiritual person.
- My brother when he got married 30 years ago had no income, really they lived on cordial dogs and noodles and now he is a millionaire . The funny thing about it is they say they are just as happy as they were when they are poor. With love cash makes no difference.
- My mother married my father who was a very poor man. He grew up in a two room apartment with eight people, he slept on the floor. My mother’s family was in the United States longer and was much better off. They have been married 59 years and he is a millionaire. Of course, when they were poor they loved each other just the same, it makes no difference if you are a spiritual person.
A well paid job is highly over rated
Guys wake up, the biggest lie when you are in your 20s is a well paid job is something good to strive for. In your 30s maybe you still believe this as you see other guys pulling ahead of you and you need to compete. If you still are believing this myth in your 40s you probably should have a big ‘L ‘ on your forehead.
Think of movie stars, they all get divorced. They all have tons of assets and basically all, with few exceptions, get divorced. VIPs are unhappy. There are no Romeo and Juliets among that crowd. Consider this:
- Rich guys are poor in dating – All, not some mind you, of my rich lawyer friends and business capitals of industry got less women to choose from than I. I am not Brad Pitt either. I could date many intelligent beautiful women as a poor man. Guys that work all the time or were attracting women with money, got very fake boring girls and lower quality in terms of looks. Trust me on this love and money are two different ideas.
- A high paid job will cost you in terms of health. You will be in for a short life and a sluggish, mildly depressed life.
- A high paid job destroys your soul if you start to attach your ego to it. All you will be is your money, what happened to the child inside you?
- Most guys that are high paid are boring and girls know this. Any guy that is interesting will get more girls that could fall in love with him than a rich guy. Girls do not respect rich men. I do not know why. They laugh at them.
- Poor guys and women – Many poor guys are total player and have wives and many kids. Rich guys if they get married they have like 1 or 2 and their wives leave them.
- I see really rich and famous guys marry hopeless women. I see many poor guys marry submissive beautiful fairly tale princess they that will cherish them all the days of their lives.
If you have not figured it out by now, the corporate world is sticks. This is not living. I understand if you need to pay the bills but do not put your ego and pride into your job. A job is just that, to pay the bills if does not define you.If you understand this you will not have to worry about girls and money. Love is something spiritual. Love is from God.
What to do on a date if you have no money
- Go to a used bookstore and buy some worn out copy of your favorite writer and take your date to a park bench and read to her. Make it a big deal, pick some flowers and make some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. If you have charm this will work better than any expensive restaurant.
- Walk along the river and charm her with fantastic stories of your childhood.
- Tell her about your family or friends or something you are passionate about while you sit in a meadow.
These are a few ideas to start. But if you start from the beginning that money is not part of your relationship, then she has no choice but to love you for who you are. If she does not, it is better you go your separate ways as she is not poet enough to see your beauty.
What if you are poor and can not get a date? Put your life in God’s hands and say God whatever you want of me, thy will be done. There is someone for everyone and if you open your mind and heart and ask the universe to bring you what you need in your heart of hearts and you will use your gifts for Gods work on this earth, you will be able to move mountains. You will not get any more dates, you will get your one and only love. However, you must be willing to give up all that you have, including your attachment to money to find this peal of great price.
What about women who have financial plans, believe in prenups and mutual funds
Good for them, do they want love or money. God give each of us a very limited time here and God is love. God does not care about your bank account. If you want to live like your divine creator, a life of love and fulfillment, enter relationships not based on cash, but love. Love is always enough.
What about all these financial adviser women and lawyers tell you that you need a prenuptial agreement and love and money are to be well thought out? I would not ever date any of them, they are some 40 something girls with short hair and a control stick to grid. They are lost souls.
Oh one more thing, they are not attractive on bit. These women financial gurus and advisors are not exactly cordial.
If not money what do women want?
They want someone who makes their heart skip a beat when they come into the room, someone who turns their world upside down, that if you tell them to turn the page of a book they will. Someone who makes the moon appear in the sky and the stars shine at night. You can be a total geek with no money, but if you are a girl’s champion and with all the sincerity in your heart believe she is your other half and pursue her and look her in the eye and tell her you need her, until she has no choice but to love you, then this is what a women wants. Total surrender.
The guy wasn’t my boyfriend khm if you calculate I was 14 years old at that time, I didn’t really think of these things, this person is my friend’s boyfriend.:) I have a pretty good radar to avoid serious relationship with these type of people. And yes I’m a giver, I want to help others but I separate this two personality: the one taking care of the emotions side, and the one thinking rationally.
As I said I hate money, my family don’t even have a car! Nor do my boyfriend’s family have, and I don’t miss a car either (I live in the capital so it may sound strange). I’m not interested in titles, it should be his ambition to get higher. The US and my country is million years far away in the way of thinking. You can’t compare it.
This is how life taught me, this is what I see everyday. Not always the man is the only provider(just telling my mom is more a provider than my father, but she is a simple white collar)also the woman. Having a stable job is basic for me. If he hasn’t got then dang that’s life, but he SHOULD look for one and not killing the time on the coach.
And sorry but I’m an atheist,that’s why these christian doctrines are not moving me (but I have my moral and conscience) so I will stick to Mother Nature till the end (though it doesn’t mean that I don’t read and learn about other religions).
Oh and I nearly forgot money doesn’t change the fact how much I love the person, but if it’s about starting a family a poor guy (in my dictionary someone who doesn’t have money to have enough mood, and don’t want to change or can’t change this situation) won’t be the first on my list.
It will sound strange but I believe in corpulente and that how I picture my future will really happen. I think I’m getting off-topic maybe because it’s already late.
My sister told me that she would prefer a decent guy without money, than a real bastard with.
But it also comes to mind that women/girls won’t date a nobody even if he has money.
What you write about girls and money is true. Trust me, despite modern conventional wisdom or TV portrays of the rich and famous men with beautiful girls, this is not true. . A rich man does not gets better quality and more girls, this is not the case. The rich men I know are very uncool, they have less time for the girl because they are too busy maintaining their empire, that is working, and last but not least, they have huge ego problems, with some exceptions of course.
Girls want to be with a normal guy that will help them with the family rather than some rich player that is even slightly egotistical. Arrogant people are not good for dating.
Look at my situation. I had a nice career going in investing and finance in Boston, but I did not meet my wife until I left my career and lived in a 200 square foot apartment with no car and washing my clothes in the sink. I know what I am talking about, I have travelled all over the world and seen an array of different cultures. Girls care about love, not money.
The ones that say they want love and money, I drop like a bad habit, because like the Bible says you can not serve two masters. Love is the only thing that lasts in this life and the only think that you take with you when you are gone. Women in some ways are wiser than men and know this intuitively at some level. If a woman has been corrupted by society than she will say’ love and money’, I want both. If she is pure in heart and true, she will say love. Actaully it is a good way to smoke girls out and see what they are about in their heart a soul.
There is a word for girls who go for men with money. There is nothing wrong with it, it is their choice, but if you get into a relationship based on that know the potential downfalls. What if the money runs out because the economy turns south, that is has a recession? I know many a rich bankers who are looking for financial capital. I know stock traders who are in debt. The fortunes of money and finance change very fast and more primitive girls who go for love and money both do not have the foresight to see this.
I know girls like doctors like guys like models. Well if the doctor is doing his profession out of compassion and the girl sees this is OK. But if the girl just wants a socialite high society lifestyle, again there is a word for these girls who pursue lifestyle through a man. It is called sponsoring at the least.
I think the Admin is mainly talking about Western Women. That said there are Eastern Europeans/Asian/South American Women that will adjust in either direction. In other words, if they want you to be 100% the bread-winner they will make this known and not be expected to work. Many women make this known, some men choose to ignore it.
But the majority of women UNDERSTAND that they will help with the bottom line, but maybe not the primary income source. Even Western Women understand this, here comes the rub –
Most American/Canadian/British/Australian/Kiwi (Anglo Culture) women want their income to push them from merely average (about 50K per year in America) to at least above average (75k-100k). Go look around You Tube, you’ll find plenty of women mostly career oriented say they will not date or marry a man who makes less than she does. So if you make 35K and she makes 75K, guess what. You’ll be sitting at home alone, on top of that the chances of you meeting such a woman are slim and none, unless it as a blind date setup by somebody because she’s close to 30 and unmarried usually.
I think what happens with Eastern European Women and Western Men in this –
Those looking for a stay-at-home type end up marrying a woman who wants to work outside the home and men that want a woman to equally contribute to the bottom line, marry stay-at-home types.
This is mostly because men don’t fully make their intentions known + put the “deal breakers” on the table far too soon.
Teaching English in the place you would like to find a wife is a decent suggestion as well, if you follow the blogs of some of these expats you’ll find many of them are married to native women.
Great blog.
I am not so well verse with physiology of woman brain but i think her thinking depend on her family atmosphere if her parents suffer due to lack of money then definitely she will search a rich boy and i think every girl has moderate thinking of marrying a person who is stable in financial or that she think with time he will became financial stable.
Not true, most poor girls from the Polish villages my family are from marry guys from another countryside. I did not have a job and lived in an 18 meter flat, wearing white t-shirts, when my wife meet me. For a woman of virtue money is not a factor in mate selection.
Statistically people marry within their classes most of the time. How can you argue with that.
If you marry for money it is the hardest way to earn it. We live in a world were capitalism is the name of the game and anyone with a reasonable mind for understanding this, can make money today. So why not choose your mate based on compassion and love, and let God worry taking care of you. Like the Bible says look at the birds in the field do they worry about their means.
Marry for love not for money.