I was out walking about Kraków, the other day and I ran into an American girl (any North American female). Whenever, I meet an American girl in Europe no matter if it is in France or Eastern Europe I usually get the same vibe. Let me explain.
American girl encounter
Since I have lived in Europe for going on seven years now, if I meet an American I often have a small chat, as it is refreshing to hear my language and in my own American accent. However, if it is an American woman, wow, the conversation gets old fast as these women revert into back to their old behavioral programming as if they were in the USA.
I was chatting with this American gal (she was not even remotely attractive, overweight and no style) and immediately she was trying to compete with me. She was giving me the, I have lived longer than you and am an expert on Europe, I make more money than you, generally your are not worth much in my eyes vibe. After a little conversation, she sized me up and assumed I was ‘just an English teacher’ , even making a remark such as that. After which she basically dismissed me from her gracious presence.
However, she did asked me how long I lived here. It was longer than her, and she saw I spoke the language (I did not tell her what I really do for work), she became very stand offish and flakey.
Why American girls (and many guys) act this way – Have you ever known an American lady like this? It is because our American culture (which has many postive things) is competitve. Let me explain, the competitiveness in the work place can not be turned off for many and when you have a cordial conversation with someone of the opposite gender all kind of weird ego defense mechanisms kick in and the conversation is really not warm and friendly.
My advice – do not date an American girl unless you are really in love. There are too many other fish in the sea. Go for a easy going European for example.
If this American girl I meet was from France, I would not ever have this type of weird vibe. I personally have never any warmth and kindness when talking to an American girl in Europe, never any connection, rather just an informational exchange that is stand offish and cold. If they get the chance to put you down a little they will. To chat with an American girl feels artificial and fake. I think again this is out hyper competitive culture we were raised in.
A European girl whether I meet her in America or Europe will be more open and warmer and the conversation is not about sizing you up.
Oh and just so you do not think I go around picking up women, I was with my wife and daughter and we were at a neighborhood park, and her child was playing and speaking English also. A very non threatening situations as parents often chat while their children are in the sandbox.
American women that have been to Europe
When I was in the States living in Boston, I used to go to yoga at Baptiste yoga. It was a good way to relax as I was working the American standard 12 hour day. This one girl, I think her name was Deanna or something exchanged cordial but light conversation. I was not interested in her in the least, but just because we saw each other regularly I was friendly. Then Deanna went to Europe. An American girl in Europe for 4 months. She came back and would really not even talk to me. She felt this experience of 4 months in Europe put her at another level (Uhm I am a EU citizen and speak a few language, that did not matter, she was above me now).
Girls from the USA and Canada in Europe or out
My conclusion is American women are often about competition. It’s sad that American culture is so materialistic and values people hold dear are based on this. The basis of basic human relationships, whether friendship or love is often about money or at least ego and one upping the other guy.
Read my lips: Love is never ever about money. Ever. If you meet a girl who wants love and money, my advice do not walk, run away. If you ever meet a girl who wants a prenuptial, leave her standing at the altar (before the ceremony) and do not marry her. Love is a not about money. Love is not about competition. You do not compete with your spouse in anything, unless it is a backyard game of badminton. Love and marriage is about humbling yourself 100% to serve the other person in your life. I believe love is all or nothing. It is about surrendering your ego of the ‘I’ for the ‘us’. My wife believes the same and we have a sincerely blissful marriage.
I would not ever consider some competitive American girl in Europe or North America. Even if she was cool and pretty OK, chances are society’s programming is so deep that it would be hard for her to fight it. This means that if push comes to shove, in real deep water’s she might pull a total Benedict Arnold and walk out on you, after she has a war party with her girlfriends. Of course many American girls make good wives but the social trends are towards the break up of the family in America.
I recommend for any American guy who is single and out there dating, consider doing what I did. Do not exclude the possibility that your other half is the girl next door. I believe in destiny. Destiny is not about location or comfort. Love is not about planning or mapping it out, it is about taking a chance and playing to win. Like the Bible says, selling all you have to find the peal of great price. The treasure that is beyond anything you would ever imagine and giving up your life to get this. This is love.