I have a foreign bride
My grandparents were immigrants to the USA, hence I had no problem marrying a girl from the old country. Do not yield to the mocking or imitation from Western cynics who know nothing about the ideal of romantic love. I am passionately begging you, if you have any connection to Europe or Asia or South America or Africa do not rule out marrying a nice girls from the village.
My Grandparents did and so did I.
I have a dual citizenship and have no objection to international. Yet I do not recommend you order her or pick her out from a catalogue, metaphorically or virtual. I recommend you live an authentic life. With this authenticity including taking risks such as introducing yourself to a perfect stranger face to face, on a vacation or trip you are on. You want to find true love not just choose someone. My goodness.
The purpose of this post is to tell you exactly how to find a love not a mail order bride, if you will.
Look I can tell you from experience, being single is lonely and painful, on par with physical pain. I remember sitting in my Boston apartment after work and thinking, I have it all, looks money, a pure heart, but I am nothing without the love of my life, where is she and how do I find her? That was the question that was burning.
The quandary of every guy I know with finding a wife
I knew I would not marry one of the girls I would meet at coffee shops from online dating sites. I recommend you do not either. Without exception if I had married any of them; I would come home from work, and escaped to my ‘man cave’ to hide a nagging onslaught from my headstrong bossy wife. I have a boss at work and see marriage as an equal partnership, not a competition for power. Think about it.
Instead, I married a girl from Eastern Europe. Explain to me, how is this wrong? My grandparents came from Eastern Europe and they were sweet, moral good human beings who I am eternally grateful to for their model of a life of piety and a labor of love towards their family.
I moved Europe, to study, meet my wife (not online but face to face) and many years later we live in the USA happily ever after, we are living a fairy-tale.
Mind you, many American women scorn this behavior or belittle it, claiming this is the signature of a man who can not get a date. My rebuttal nothing further from the truth. I had a woman in every port, but none was worthy of my hand in marriage. It is that simple.
If you are a guy in the USA for example, you get pulled into careerism, date hopeless American women who are hyper materialistic or argumentative, impressed by titles, statistically will divorce you if you do marry them and do not factor such things as virtue and intellectual curiosity into the marital equation. I have a solution, get a mail order bride.
Online Dating vs. Mail order personals
- Mail order sites – Not recommended. The ladies on there are motivated to find a husband and they are in English, but is this love?
- Local search for brides – Think like a native and open communication with females in a way that normal ladies from the countryside would communicate, that is with local dating site.I first recommend you get your feet wet with free online dating in the local country that you are want to find a wife. For example, if you want to find a girl in:
- Balance flirting with interviewing – dance with them – Do you remember the Fonz? Be cool like him. Do not ask for their photos right away or engage in mindless banter about physical relations, too soon. Take the high ground and balance your interaction between flirting and questioning to determine if the girl is worthy of your hearts affection.
Specific places I recommend looking for a bride
Poland try, sympatia.pl or Russia mamba.ru or meetic.fr for France. Granted these are in the local language but you can navigate them if you use a translate tool.
Take my above specific website seriously. Also look at articles on my website that relate to the geographical region you how to find your other half. I have partially organized it this way and give you more recommendations.
State lines or borders they are the same.
This is no different then dating a girl from another state. If you live in California are you tell me you should not date a girl from Texas? My point is it is one world and as we move to a greater respect for all cultures, boundaries do not matter as much.
Bequeathing a parting tip
You can not mail order a bride. This is pretty funny. It would be nice if you could. You just choose one from a book of mail order brides and you are all set. Even Russian brides (this is a complete guide on Russian dating). Or you can try my Love Phrases in Russian page (leads you to my collection of love phrases) need to be won. They are looking for a champion.
- First , if you are looking for a princess, you need to be a prince. That is the first rule.
- Second, You have to try. It might take a year but if you look hard enough you will find that door that will lead you to your princess.
- Third, Understand mail order brides are nothing more than an old fashion word for winning a girl with words and letters, in this case e-mails.
Any questions just ask. Remember:
He who hesitates is lost
Do not be lost or feel you are alone. I have been there, I have traveled the world, live a good part of my life abroad as an expat. I know all about visas and immigration, and dating and dating scams and girls in general. Although there are no experts on life, I have accrued a reasonable level of wisdom regarding marriage. The proof is the simple fact I am happily married.
History and evolution (devolution) of shopping for a wife
I remember leafing through catalogs via mail in the States and physical books when I went to places like Ukraine. A lot of pretty face in those books, also a number of old fashion looking styles, that were signatures of the Soviet era, you know hydrogen peroxide blondes and female leisure suits.
There was zero percent chance I would have replied to any of the ads as I had too many girls in play, whom I met face to face. It was more a curiosity factor and more about flirting with the secretary at the marriage agency. Not that the women in “mail order bride catalogs” were not optimal choices, rather I think it was not my style.
As incredibly geeky and low self-esteem I had, I had score of girls in play, pretty ones, doctors and girls that could be ballet dancer types. So my question for you is why would you want to order a bride? Maybe there is another way.
Women delivered to your door, shipping labels, postage paid and all
Mail order bride catalogs evolved into Russian and Asian dating sites where you pay for correspondences. These had a huge economic motive. Money and love do not mix. Better are free dating site.
However, a some paid sites are OK if they have quality control. I personally like something like Catholic or Christian dating or whatever religion you are. Are this is a commonality of shared values that transcend legal boarders.
The from these to more traditional dating sites with profile approval and quality control you can meet good people. I actually worked at a company called “profile approval”, which did just that. The advantage is you get translations and screening from scams (proverbial junk mail), over the free dating sites. That is the main selling point for pay for girl marriage sites.
- Yet as technology changed more and more women from ‘the rest of the world’ outside the US and UK started to be accessible to all. It was less an issue of imperfect information about where to find a mate and more which girl to commit to.
- Further, this recent ‘crop of girls’ all have learned English since they started school.
Therefore, the need for catalog buying of female profiles and correspondences and translations, became less important as the ability for an agency to match someone based on probability of a real love connection. Dating sites went from simple intermediaries and visa (customs) assistance to finding a match based on everything from interests to DNA and even some bizarre compatibility tests.
Enter the world of easy access to girls as the inventory is placed online then mobile
More than once I have seen women walking down the street with their mobile phone not only in hand but carrying them close to their heart. Next time I will have to take a photo. Women embrace mobile phones like they are some type of object of endearment. Others finger phone neurotically, like smoking was in the 1960s. The world has changed, there are no typewriter factories and few ink and paper newspapers.
Today girls are online, mobile, connected to instagram.com and speak English, there is not need to order a bride. My recommended strategy is go to your target country and find one.
How not to import a wife to the USA
Go there understanding the world has changed and you will be burned if you make the mistake of assuming just because a girl is from an ‘underdeveloped’ country she is traditional, domestic and will be your ‘I dream of Jeannie in a bottle’.
My friend married a girl from Thailand, and once in America she changed and became westernized, became a dragon and he is paying out the yin-yang.
He said, I never saw it coming. I did.
Screen women exclusively on moral ideals. The other stuff called ‘looks’ or basic equipment is all universal.
Who to marry? – You want a super hot chick that has such pure lofty ideals that shames you and uplift you.
One’s physical body is weak because the more ease and comforts you give it and give into, the more the body and sense crave. – Saint Teresa of Avila
Can you imagine meeting a girl that talks like this? There are score of women out there that have authentic pearls of wisdom rolling off their tongue and the courage of their convictions to aspire live this way in act, word and deed.
Why consider anyone else? You should cast the other frogettes back into the pond. You bring a God center girl whose beauty and grace match her virtue you will not be giving half your salary and your house after legal fees to her, while she is riding some newly discovered buck.
However, back to my first point she has to be so physically hot that when you talk to her, you are asking yourself. ‘why is this girl even talking to me’.
Problems with importing a bride
- Department of immigration, keep your eyes down and dot your ‘i’-s. – Keep your head and eyes down and do not get argumentative. Looking them in the eye can be seen as a sign of aggression. Just joking, it is basically like the post office in on espresso. Be easy and docile fill out the paperwork and move on. Dump as much paper on them as you can to support your case. If you get rejected ask for an informational interview and they can direct you. You will have to hit the reset button a few times and take a few chill pills as it is a bureaucratic maze. You can not, at least not easy get a visa for your fiance or foreign wife. You need to jump through a lot of hoops with visas and money with the department of immigration. J-3 or I-130 visas are the most common. They are all doable mind you, just do not expect a Sunday stroll in the park. It took about 9 months to get a green card for my wife, I had good US income and we have a daughter and I am a good law-abiding citizen. I also had a little bit of help I suspect from the consulate as I had some medical problems living abroad (that are better now). If you want to import a bride have at least $25,000 income.
- More on how to get a visa for your foreign fiance or wife.
- Russian bride in Mississippi – Biggest hurdle is the bride will not necessarily want to come to the USA. I remember meeting a Moscow girl who was engaged to an American and she was so excited that she was going to move to the USA and live in Mississippi. I told her with a restrained grin, ‘oh you are just going to love Mississippi’. Girls around the world have no idea what a frontier the USA still is. Further women are more attached to their families and will start to be counting the days when they can see their folks next. So there better be a strong love, a spiritual love between you and your bride.
Mail order bride, not exactly a thing of the past they have just metamorphosed into something different. My advice is to skip the search for ‘wives to order’ from the shopping mall of the world, the Internet. Instead be an old fashion romantic. Travel and see the world because you love travel and perhaps you will meet her rather than some wholesaler.
Take the road less traveled, bike through the villages and countrysides of a country you fall in love with, if if be Provence or Tuscany or the Tartra mountains of Eastern Europe or Carpathia in Romania. Find your princess with a sense of adventure, rather than methodical scanning. Take your life by the you know what and live.