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The most important quality to look for in a girl

A princess who wears the crown of humility

The quality that I personally find attractive in a girl is humility. It is your winning selection criteria for finding a wife that will give you a life of happiness. This is why humility is the ultimate quality for me in a girl.

Yes, I know, this is contrary to what American pop-culture teaches. Women will shout you down and accuse you of wanting someone to control, a pushover. However, consider the source. If someone tells you that, it is because they do not understand the spiritual virtue of humility. I would recommend you do not try to teach them humility as it is a waste of time. Just walk away and do not say anything, because you are not your brother’s keeper.

Betroth a princess with this quality: humility

I often repeat the similar themes on my website about dating, but it is important to read them. because, you need to let this sink in your brain. Think of it like a coaching, a mental massage, and comfort in the fact that you are not crazy or amiss in your thinking. Rather much of the world is, and will tell you up is down and down is up.

Self-confidence as the antithesis of humility in women (and men)

Western women are all about self confidence and empowerment. They have been taught it in public schools and it is reinforced in movies and TV.  Public schools are a key source of indoctrination and without parental intervention the schools produce adults with a skull full of mush. You can not deprogram someone who has been raised in that culture. Maybe you can but it is not worth the effort. Better is to find someone abroad or in a pocket of America which has a sub-culture which holds different values in esteem.

  • If you want to go up against that, self-confidence bordering on pride, on a daily basis, you might as well, put your assets in your mother’s name and do not tell you wife about them.
Self-confidence is the lie of the dating world.

Self confidence is the biggest lie in the dating world

Women say they want a guy with confidence and they themselves try to project this in every conversation. They engage in witty banter and try to one up you and size you up based on your perceived achievements.

Do you know what real self confidence (in contrast to pop-culture understanding) is a form of humility. It is being authentic and loyal to your value system. Taking up your cross everyday to humble yourself to be a servant, and see the humanity in all people, rather than seeing them as an aspect of your life.  Even self-abasement and flagellation (in the right measure and meaning), self-punishment, fasting and and ascetic practices are honorable. But self confidence, no, this is the opposite of what you want.

How do I know?

I do not know if I have any pop-culture confidence at all, however, I can say objectively that if I was single, I would have no problem chatting up model quality girls in any country in the world. I am talking Victoria Secrets caliber, and I have little self-confidence.I know this sounds contradictory, but it is true.

  • I am filled with self-doubt, painfully shy, regret and insecurities, but it is not about that. I feel awful most of the time about myself. I am filled with frustration and resentment.

I am insecure about basically everything, money, my face, my looks, my background, my intelligence but it is not about that. I believe that God has a purpose for me, and despite my insecurities and fears, I am trust God. I know with my incompleteness, I found the wife of my dreams, travel the world, I am a Professor of Economics, lay chess competitively and write my own software,  and oh yeas, grow my own food, and I am happy, Why? Because with God you can move mountains, whereas, the person who lacks faith’s, life is a slave to ego gratification.

  • So see self-confidence is really not worth much int he dating world.
Humility as a virtue has to be worked on like training the physical body

How is humility achieved?

It is achieved through the daily practice,  of a religious ritual, whether it is reading a holy book or a chain of prayers which asks for forgiveness.

The early desert fathers (living in the North African and Middle Eastern deserts), of my religion use to repeat the Jesus prayer hundreds of time a day when they walked or strike their chest when a bad thought comes to mind. Virtue comes from Latin and means strength. You can not have strength without training. So I am a skeptic, if someone put themselves out there as nice, where is the proof? Do they say the Rosary or memorize the Bible?

I have seen women do this. Yes smoking hot women, who put to shame most Hollister models have a practice of self-abasement and repentance. So they do exist.

The rewards of a prayerful wife is a life of beauty and harmony

What if you are not Christian?

Jewish, Christian, Muslim, that is the prophetic religions of Israel all have a similar tradition. The Chinese religion of Tao and Confucianism also have similar rituals, as do the contemplative religions of India, with Hinduism and Buddhism. Religion is like a language and each language has these structure in their lexicon.

What if someone is spiritual or agnostic or a non-believer?

I have seen ethical atheist develop an internal ethic, but if you are in the trenches of life, I highly recommend you do not go for these girls. You are in the battlefield of life and there are not atheists in foxholes. You need to put away childish things. When I was a child I thought like a child, life is too precious to think like a child or you will be playing with fire.

Go for a believer or also has humility as her summa bonum. Someone that tells you they are not good. Someone who tells you they are a bad person and has trouble forgiving themselves.

For me this is a person looking for redemption. And that is what life is about. It is about redemption.

Choose a girl who is a mystic not an agnostic

What about a nice girl, a good girl?

No such thing. Everyone will say they are nice and good. Many women abroad are attractive because they do not eat denatured diets and are not obese.

How often we confuse beauty with virtue – how often we confuse nice with virtue

In contrast, my wife says she is not even that nice. She was so mean to me, when we were dating. She was not nice, but it is not about that.  Nice means nothing. Super hot means something, and humble means something. Nice means jack. So do not go to Eastern Europe and strike a rapport with a girl who puts herself out there as nice or good. Do not travel half way across the world a companion.  Me, I want someone radical, someone versed in the in the spirit of humility and purification.

Where to find these girls?

If you meet a girl with humility and she is super hot, and you feel she is the one, chase her across the stars like I did.
Do not worry about your job or money or your parents or if she will reject you. What if you are broke, your parents disown you and she rejects you. So what. It will happen, but do not make a big deal about it, it is your metaphorical red badge of courage, and you putting away childish things.

Where to find these girls?

I have given you hints on my site, I am a big believer in traveling aboard, and living abroad. I do nest alone, not with a group, as you do not want to get weighted down.

If you find that girl of your dreams chase her around the world until she is your wife.

The only guys I know that did not get married or found their true love, in a year or so of being a real expatiate, are guys that can not get off the player roller coaster by choice. They have something to prove to their egos, they are not religions and are basically lost souls.

So if you want to find a wife, tune your subconscious radar into the frequency of humility. Find a super hot chick, with humility, by living abroad or domestically with similar values (much harder). Remember nice is not a desirable quality, humility is.

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Get a Wife or Husband

How to get married when your parents are crazy

Your parents are not really crazy mind you, just enough to flatten your chance of getting married in your 20s. The experiences you had growing up, and the messages you received from your parents, influence the way you see yourself, and hence your success in attracting a mate. When you want to date and get married, your parents will test and challenge you every step of the way. Further, the echo of their neurosis and fears will reverberated in your subconscious affecting your life choices.

Every memory I have, even the sweetest ones, are clouded with a little bit of regret and sorrow. Perhaps you feel the same? It is hard for me to even go back down memory lane, when often on the next turn is a painful memory. I had a bitter sweet childhood. However, I learned to overcome the experiences I was set up with,  forgive and not go to the dark-side. It is easy to say you understand  this, but are you married, what is holding you back?

To further complicate this, if your parents had a successful marriage, statistically, you will. If not, you will have to be aware of how not to repeat their mistakes.

  • What you need to know is this: life really begins when you are married.

Life before you are married is a lower level of existence, basically every cell in your body is waiting for you to pair off and reproduce.  Today, despite my personal challenges from my long adolescence (lets say until age 30),  if you ask me how my life is, I would reply,  I am one of the happiest people I know. How is this?

Read my list below to put yourself on a self-correcting course. The purpose of this post is to give you ideas to get you back on track that leads to the alter.

Go for a wife that instinctively does it for you, out of one of your fantasies. Not a conception your parents think you should marry.

Proposal for you:

I recommend to print this article and highlight the three points that are most relevant to your situation. When you have identified those three points, you can write me personally (contact page) or leave a comment. I will give some advice personal to your situation.

You have to get married

Let me lay all the cards on the table.  You have to get married, if you want a full rich happy life.  Do not believe the media/studies, as we know they are not objective and their mission to get attention is to shock you, and to tell you up is down and down is up. Do not believe the unhappy stories of others, because the lamenting tend to be the most vocal.  Trust me, I have legions of friends that are married and happy for many years, including myself. My parents have been happily married for over 65 years. That is real, life experience not a statistic.

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics

  • All the experiences I had when I was single, does not compare to one moment of being with my family. That is the truth.

If you want to rationalize away your birthright to be happily married go ahead, but it is a low level of existence. Like the Architect (the Sigmund Freud looking spokesman for the machines) in the Matrix said:

There are levels of survival we are prepared to accept.

You have to get married because you need to have a partner to talk to. You need to have unrestricted physical relations. You need to get married because God wants us to, unless you pursue a life of monastic service to humanity.  I am a parent and having a child is amazing, you get to relive your childhood in a better way. Being married and having a family is not an option, it is the fulfillment of your deepest longings.

You want to pass on your genes rather than having your seed wiped from the face of the earth.

Bring the girl of your dream into reality and make her your wife. This starts by reprogramming you thought patterns.

Then why do people (you) have such trouble getting married/with marriage?

It is because of the subconscious dialogue they have in their brain. Your beautiful perfect innocent tabula rasa you were born with, was corrupted by your environment. Yes your peers, and the media,  but more likely your parents imprinted messages early on that is your stumbling block. Further, your parents did not give adequate coaching on how to choose a mate and be happy.

In contrast, many parents give people the opposite information. Or the media and friends have told you that marriage is passé. Parents are good about telling  their kids about money and careers, but love is infinitely more important than money.  Parents  may even want you to get married, but do not tell you how specifically to pick a mate. They have picked a mate for you, or have their vision of a mate that is best suited for you. Do not do it. Find your own vision of love.

This is not about blaming our parents

They were doing the best they could, and they are truly great people,  my personal heroes,  but that does not mean they are not blocking you.  Some parents are too strict like mine, and some parents are too easy like some of my friends. The net effect is you need to overcome their programming. It is recognizing the pattern of thinking stopping you from getting married, where they came from, so you can get married and be happy.

The problem with the parental message about marriage

It is packed with emotion. Their vision of your mate is a manifestation of their insecurities and lack of confidence in you.  It is packed with fear and poor guidance. Your parents projected a lot of anger and fear on you. Maybe not everyone reading this, but there are a lot of parents from the last generation that knew little about good parenting.

Many parents have failed marriages or have given little or no coaching about love. For example, an acquittance of mine is a woman, almost 30 says she wants kids, but does not believe in marriage.  Wow that is messed up. Her father left her mother and is a playboy. I wonder if there is a connection. Be honest with yourself and examine your belief’s in relation to your parental experience.

An unexamined life is not worth living – Socrates

Also, examine the though of your potential mate. Smoke them out in terms of their true beliefs. Question them about their belief and their experiences growing up.

Below are is some advice/wisdom based on personal experience how to override your programming

The Bible says to ‘Honor your Mother and Father’. The greatest way to honor your Mother and Father is to not repeat their mistakes. To live your own life. To own your belief’s including those about love.

To thy own self be true

  1. Get your parents out of your head – You need to be geographically away from your parents, if you have had even a hint of a toxic relationship with them. Move to another city, or Europe, like I did, like my brother did, or an opposite coast like my sister did. Yes, I did not get married until I moved to Europe and I temporarily banished myself from my family. In today’s economy it seems harder but, you can do it. In fact you can not afford to do it, if your parental relationship is toxic. In nature the bird pushes the little bird from the nest to fly. Once you are away from them call them maybe once a week or less on Sunday to let them know you are alive.  When you give your parents grandchildren they will love you more than if you are an adult child feeding off their emotional mammary ducts.

    The longer you stay with your parents to ‘save money’ you will be paying for it later with psychiatrists bills

  2. Remove the noise – Try to engage in light conversations with your parents, and steer them away from topics like money and dating. Basically, when you call your parents you need to brace for impact. Then learn the art of steering them from life topics. I do not lie, but read my lips, do not have your hand on the Bible when talking to your parents.  Additionally, do not watch the news and be on Facebook more than a few minutes a day (you do not want feed your psyche junk food by attention fiends). You can in fact set Google News to just a few positive filters. Stay clear of Tinder or anything that will give you a cheap rush or ego boast. Basically clean up your eternal influences  including your parents subtle probes into your personal life.
  3. Spend a lot of time dreaming about what you really want in a wife or husband? – Go back to what you think you wanted in your youth as a mate. Try to remember what you originally liked in a male or female physically. Was it long legs in a woman or a blond haired guy for example? Really take the time to be honest what you think is hot. Fantasize about this person.
  4. Do date people who believe marriage is forever. My first and most important rule is date an idealist. Someone that has a passion for their lofty ideals (not political) above everything else. This is often manifest in religion or yoga for example. This is centered on dating someone who believes in marriage in the abstract sense not just something to do. Why get married if it they believe love is conditional? People have vows that go “as long as the love shall last’. This is nonsense, marry someone who believes in ‘until death do us part’ – ‘for richer or poorer and sickness and in health’.  Women will say, ‘he has mental problems’. Well is that not sickness?  Stand by your man.

    You, who are on the road must have a code that you can live by. And so become yourself because the past is just a good bye. -“Teach Your Children” by Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young

  5. Do read books on marriage by religious writers.  You need to have this influence in your life. You need to deprogram your mind from the media and even your parents. You need your life to be an instrument of the Divine. Do date people who have a passion for reading positive meaningful books and movies. Not liberal psycho babel, but real books like the Bible, by Saints or Christian writers,  or books on yoga or Yogic writers, or transcendentalist like Thoreau and Emerson. Read books not by psychologists, the modern day sophists, but spiritual leaders. It does not matter the specific ones,  there are thousands of books, as long as they are positive and stand for ideals above day to day life.
  6. Do date sensitive people – Sincere, painfully sensitive gentle, forgiving people. Date people that apologize often. Insensitive people will cause you a life of misery. Find someone with real caring and emotion, that you can complain to. Marry and empath. This will not lead to endless complaining, but rather, they will inspire you to be strong for them.
  7. Do not date materialistic people Love and money are opposites. Parents often over emphasis career.

Do you really care if you are poor if you are healthy and in love? Money and career are a substitute for love. I would rather drive across the country with the girl of my dreams in a beat up old convertible, than dine in a five star hotel with a woman I did not love.

You can have two of three things in life. Money, health or love. You choose the two you want.

  • Do not date trashy people Swearing, selfish, smoking, non-prayerful/non-meditating people. The world is filled with base people. Love them but do not marry them.
  • Your parents might believe that no one is good enough for you. Although my parents have been married over 65 years, no one was good enough for any of their five children. This is a common fallacy parents project on children, because they want to protect their kids or they are generally judgmental. The person who is good enough is the person who you are attracted to and will love you forever with gentleness and kindness.
  • Parents or other will say: Marrying a beauty does not matter, its the inside that counts. This is ridiculous, no this is ridonculous.  I say go for someone you think is hot, because you are going to wake up the rest of your life next to this person and sleep with them every night, trust me you want to go for hot to maximize your happiness. Is that not a huge reason people get married? That is to have ‘physical relations’. Go for someone who does it for you on a physical level, then make sure they are a Godly, sensitive, intellectually curious person.
  • You think: You are not attractive enough to marry a beautiful person – Lucky for you, because of a millions of years of evolution there is no way you are not attractive. Evolution has made it so that everyone has a physical allure and sensuality. Everyone can be hot. You just have to get in shape and have the right style.
  • Society tell you: Marriage is about fighting and jocking for position and dominance. Wrong, marriage is never about splitting control 50-50 or anything remotely related to power. Find a mate that is gives 100% and you give 100% without question to their who is on top or has that 1% edge. For example, what if one of you is in a coma? Love is about giving yourself fully and find someone who believes the same.
  • Your fears tell you: Marriage is about a ‘practical’, ‘reasonable’, choice.– Marriage is about primitive irrational desires for gene replication, based on deep subconscious longings and fantasies of youth. Marriage is not a business transaction. How is it practical I left my $100,000 plus job and lived in another country, in a 200 square foot apartment, for many years to marry a poor girl from the countryside? Did I make the right choice? Yes you bet, the best choice of my life.
  • Realize that your parents arguing traumatized you. – Realize it was not about you but about their fears. The Bible talks about sins being passed down from generation to generation. I always thought this was bunk, in the literal sense, but it is real if you understand that this energy might express itself from parent to child and echo though many generations.
  • Parents tell you: You need to get your career going and money established before you can think about marriage. – If that is true, why do people where I live, have seven kids and have no money, while the career oriented women have one child in day care? You need no money, only love to have a family. Kids need love, not career parents.
  • Parents will tell you: You need to married someone in your same social-economic class. – I went to an all boys English boarding school in New England, my wife daughter of a farmer growing up in communist Poland. We are so happy. Social class means nothing.
  • What if you are still too connected to your parents in a business.  If this is holding you back in anyway move away as far as you can. Out of sight out of mind.
  • You think: People will look funny at you if you have a foreign spouse.  Boundaries are for politicians not for love. We are all God’s children and God knows no political boundaries despite what the drum beating politicians, nationalists and ideologues tell you. You have visa issues, there are always ways to legally live in the same country. It might not be the country of your choice but there are always ways.
  • What if parents want to arrange a marriage for you and you need to comply. – Arranged marriages do work, but I prefer a love marriage. I believe you create your own destiny. Defy logic and tradition and go with what your instinctual drive tell you. You need to marry someone your parents would approve of, social obligation and honor to your family – wrong. – You need to find the love of your life.
  •  You might think: You are not smart enough to provide a good life for your family and live the dream. – Again, if evolution brought you here, you have the brains. It is simple evolution that has honed your instinct to survive and you can. Instinct kicks in when it needs to. We grow our own food for example.
  • You might believe: You are bad and do not deserve happiness. Wrong.
  • You parents were too busy to listen or care when you were growing up. – I know and with my daughter I try not to listen but to really be there with her. Parents are busy chasing money but most important is the family.
  • Your parents said small spiteful things or large hurtful things to you. – You need to let it go.

    There is one way to literally go back in time and change the past. It is to forgive. Forgiveness is the best time machine there is.

  • You feel you wasted so much time – I felt this way and my older brother said, it does not matter about that, what matters is what you do with your life now.
  • You feel, there is no soul mate only nice choices. -Trust me your soulmate is out there, it is the person you have a family with. If you can not find your soulmate you are looking in the wrong places. Do not look on Tinder. Look in real life in yoga retreats or church or clubs but not Tinder.
  •  People will tell you: Marriage is a legal contract. False. Marriage is not about assets and contracts, it is about mating. All life is programmed for reproduction. It is the strongest drive there is, even above survival. Nature basically wants you to survive to reproduce. That is why you look good during your reproductive years. If you do not find your mate and reproduce life will not reward you with all the intangible goodness of those who are single will never understand. Less eloquently expressed, you need to get married to have ‘physical relations’ on a regular and frequent basis. Also immense emotional and spiritual rewards. You can be the biggest hook up artist in the world, but you do not have access this unless you are married. Even if you are single and living with someone it is not the same. It will never be the same.
  •  What is your scenario? You come from a home raised by a step father or step mother. You come from a single parent home. You parents are divorced. It does not matter, you can have love and marriage by jettisoning their wrong ideas.
  • Love is universal. Whether it was our immigrant grandparents or parents or us, the challenges are the same. That is to reinvent your life anew separate from the last generations ideas and expectations. With confidence and courage choose your own life free from your parents expectations.

    In conclusion

    If I listen to my parents I would either focus on my career or marry one of my parent’s rich friend’s daughters. Boring.
    If you listen to your parents programming then: when you are old and sitting in your rocker, and people ask you how was the party, you are going to say, ‘what party?’.

    Is this the experience you want have on this earth? You get one life and your experience is to play it safe. What a cowardly way to live.
    Much, no really all, of my twenties I basically was either angry or I felt I was like a bird with a broken wing, just hobbling along in life.
    Like the spiritual song sung by 19th century American slaves:

    Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen

    Everybody thinks that others can not understand what they went through. What personal hell you have endured. Worst I festered in the pendulum of regret and sorrow, the dark side, like drinking salt water that never quenched me.

    I decided to reprogram myself, I did yoga and prayed and visualized (prefer to meditation as it is more active as I like most people are slightly ADD).

    • My message is find the winning system that will liberate you from your patterns. Give visualization and prayer a chance in letting go of the past and creating your vision of your happy future.

    My message is not matter what life experience brought you to adulthood, you can reprogram yourself and be happily ever after with your family. It is your birthright and do not let anyone, including your parents, friend or society, swindle that from you.

    References:

    The Transmission of Marital Instability Across Generations: Relationship Skills or Commitment to Marriage?
    Paul R. Amato; Danelle D. DeBoer
    The Journal of Marriage and Family, November 2001

    The legacy of parents’ marital discord: Consequences for children’s marital quality.
    Amato, Paul R.; Booth, Alan
    Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Vol 81(4), Oct 2001, 627-638.

    Intergenerational Transmission of Marital Quality and Marital Instability
    Du Feng, Roseann Giarrusso, Vern L. Bengtson and Nancy Frye
    Journal of Marriage and Family
    Vol. 61, No. 2 (May, 1999), pp. 451-463

    Categories
    Get a Wife or Husband

    Dating advice from married men vs singles

    The German nihilist philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche wrote:

    A married Philosopher is a joke.

    Nietzsche went thoroughly insane, alone and lived a life of mental anguish. At the end of his life there was a moment of lucidity and he said ‘ I wrote good books once’, poor Nietzsche.  He could have contracted syphilis, from one of his quick interludes in the night that exacerbated his mental deterioration, however, it nets out to the same cause. The man was tortured by not having a wife to be loyal to, and family by his side.

    That other German who who stated the Second World War also lacked the warmth of a family, is that a coincidence? The most extreme people I know are single people.  Eventually with the decrease in hormones they become harmless, but most of them in old age are in despair. My mission is to make sure that you do not end this way. Your experience in this measureless gulf of eternity we exist in, does not need to end on a inconsequential note; a tree that falls in the forest that no one hears.

    My advice is this: be normal, and get a husband or wife have a family and a house with a white picket fence (we are making our white picket fence out of recycled wood pallets).  In the words of a reformed mobster, that life is for suckers, but now that he is living it he loves it.

    There are many armchair philosophers on the web and in real life who write about the quest for women and their conquests. Yet if they are single and giving advice, their words are empty.  I would invert Niestsche’s statement and say:

    A single Philosopher is a joke

    If you do not have the experience of a successful happy marriage and raising a family, you should not be giving advice to others about relationships. It is the blind leading the blind.

    Similarly, women who are single and over thirty are usually social train wrecks. They give the worst advice to their single women friends going through relationship problems. They give cliché proverb-isms like ‘he is selfish’ or simply discredit men’s character in a circle of females called a ‘war party’ while sipping wine. Yet to do not look at their own faults and address the root cause of why they are not married. I will get to that root cause below.

    So many choices in hot girls, just make sure they have their heads screwed on right or they will take yours.

    If a man or woman can not close the deal and get married, there is nothing wrong with them. However, they should not be giving too much advice.

    Dating advice from a single is like, a person who has never flow a plane, giving advice on how to be a pilot.

    There are too many subtle variables you have to experience for yourself.

    Granted single people might have insights worth noting,  and even an entertainment factor in their wit and banter, but I prefer to look for wisdom from someone who is walking the walk.

    Women civilize men. As much as men complain, we would be living in caves if it were not for women, they carry the torch of civilization.  Married men live statistically longer and are healthier and mentally more stable.  Men who must raise children grow mentally in a different way. Like a yoga class,  being a husband and parent requires one to be calm and flexible in a difficult moment, and committed. Being single can not teach you this.  Marriage and being a parent is supported by a million years of evolutionary programming that reinforces this responsibility and loyalty.  Nature rewards you in even greater proportion than your struggles. The satisfaction of raising a child and being a husband exceeds any joy a single person would ever understand.

    This is not some philosophical whimsical rambling, it is based on evolution of the species.

    Let me put it to you in another way, nature does not care about you personally. Nature only cares about the perpetuation of the human race. This is evolution. However, since we are aware conscious beings with an over developed cortical regions, nature knows we are different from even our hominidae relatives, therefore gives us long -term rewards for being loyal husbands and parents. Evolution will reward you for participating in family life. We are not rabbits, but have evolved away from primitive lifeforms to require a family.  However, I believe it is even more than that, read on.

    Then why are people not married and how to get the a husband or wife?

    It is simple.

    Lack of faith, prayer and patience – I do not know any single Amish family (I am writing a language program on the Amish) that is not happy and fulfilled. Is this a coincidence?  The Amish I know are universally married and happy and stay that way with large families. If you are single, it may take years of prayers and waiting for the right person. But with perseverance it will happen.

    What if you do not believe it?

    If you are a rational thinker then keep your mind open and try to understand the epistemological line from Descartes to Hegel, Heidegger, Nietzsche, Feuerbach (God a projection of Man, anthropomorphic),  Marx, (opium of the masses, social economic) to Freud (God an infantile illusion, psychological need).  Understand how this erosion of Western certainly lead to a general lack of trust in an ultimate reality came about first in philosophical ideas then though our experience in the 19th and 20th century as humans.

    Examine the real origins of your doubts.  Do your doubts even have doubts? Is it working for you?  If you dismiss faith as something for other people (usually naive or simple minded), ask yourself if your life is working for you?  How is your life, be honest with yourself?  Just be open minded that there might be a complex stratification of reality. That life is not one-dimensional and there is transcendence. I emphasis that because I believe that in this transcendence of spirit is what leads to love, true love.

    The evidence is here

    You can protest and say you do not believe or whatever.  However, the proof is in the pudding. My parents have been married 65 years and said prayer and faith was the most important part of their life.  They are happily married after 65 years and five children and endless struggles from being drafted to health issues.  Can you compare their advice to some single person’s current trend pop-psychosocial advice? Come on, 65 years of marriage, when you are married and happy after 65 years, than you can add to their simple and clear message on relationships.

    Another example, look up the singer Lauren Daigle. Read about this chick, and watch her videos. – >

    Are you telling me a girl like that will not get married? Of course she will. She has the light of God shining though her. Can you deny this?

    You can say what you want about believers, that they are naive or you just do not feel it, but the ones I know walking the walk have this inner beauty that can not be denied. I believe if you ask, God will guide you to your mate.

    If, and only if, you want to marry a humble hot chick like her, be the better man. Be someone that lifts people up with faith and joy, specifically the word of God. Practice humility by admitting your intellectualism and edcuation means nothing. Learn to practice of purification and prayer. If you want to read more about the connection of faith and happiness, you can read here -> Faith and marriage. If you want to know how specifically, I recommend a monastic readings like Thomas Kempis or develop a routine of prayer, it could be a simple prayer in the morning and evening like a key that opens and closes a door to a greater reality. If pride and ego and intellectualism is problem (it usually is) do charity in a dirt poor humble setting, until your pride and ego give way to awareness. If you do not know where to start, simply read spiritual books (classics like the Bible or written by monks or priests or minsters rather than pop-spiritual writings), and maybe say the ‘Our Father’ every evening or morning. Think  of it like a key that opens the door. Not an hour of meditation, but a few minutes.

    Wow did I get off track from the topic of relationship advice?

    Sorry for all that but, it is the most important relationship advice I can give. Prayer, even if you do not believe will lead you to happiness.

    My parents, (did I mention married for 65 years and happy) said the Rosary most of their lives together. Is that a coincidence? My parent’s advice was faith is the most important thing.  Take their advice or my advice. Remember, I am happily married, I am just saying I am not trying to keep the sparkle alive in my relationship with my wife. It is there everyday without trying.

    My advice is get a nice girl from the countryside that is focused on religion. You want to marry Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz, a hot girl on a quest for transcendence.

    Detox from the mixed messages of our pop culture, especially the ageing players, pick up artists and disgruntled feminists. The feminists and pick up artists do not realize it but they are all cut from the same cloth and single.

    Look, I am not my brothers keeper, I do not care if you believe or not. I do not care what you do with your life, I really do not. I do not get points for proselytism, if anything I find it distasteful to write. Look at my site, I write provocative things and scantily clad photos (the reason is I believe that this is natures bait), I am not a saint.

    I am a ‘rumpy-pumpy’ obsessed world traveller,  over educated intellectual, with a proverbial woman in every port, who found happiness though amazing grace.  Why put yourself through this pain of loneness and existential anxiety? Be an ally of your true self and stop the battle. Therefore, I would not dismiss the idea that we are mighty spiritual beings and this moral coil we hide out in is nothing compared to the power you have to move mountains with prayer and patience. If you want amazing love, invest in a prayer ritual, rather than pulling out your credit card for one more dating site.

    Falling in love versus wanting a wife –  Many people are under the impression they want a husband or wife. They have educated themselves, made it in their professional careers and want to get married. Wrong. You can not get a wife, buy a wife or find a husband. You have to make yourself so irresistible that someone will fall in love with you.  You have to make a chick fall hopelessly in love with you or it will not happen. You have to lose yourself and have your world turned so upside down that nothing matters except love.  Not money and house and playing it safe with career. Think of Romeo and Juliet.

    You are not radical and pull out all stops – I say it over and over. Be the fool and and give up everything for love.  Love and money, love and career or love and any else do not mix. You can not play it safe and get a wife, now days, maybe in the 1950s this worked.

    • I play chess with the US Chess Federation. One thing I learned in competition is this. If you are losing and hopeless, do not resign. Pull out all stops, sacrifice your queen make crazy attacks on the king. If you are going to lose anyway go on the offensive, be radical. Where did I learn this? I play with the Masters.

    In the end, I would rather be driving across the country in a beat up old convertible, living in cheap motels with the girl I love, than some boring stable job, surfing chicks on the Internet and hoping I find the best one based on my own personal determinate criteria or convenience to my current life situation.

    Many guys are approaching finding a wife like hunting for gold. They are trying to identify the exact locations that have the optimal probability to hit the jackpot. There is something to be said for this, but it is not the point. Better is finding a diamond in the rough.  The point is develop your spiritual authenticity and you will be bending proverbial forks with your mind (like Neo in the Matrix). Be radical in your approach to life.

    I was not looking for love, directly, it just happened.  Develop your own authentic self in a radical way and pursue your dreams and if an angel ever floats past your, chase and and bring her down to earth.

    So how is my advice on this site different than others?

    Like Niezsche’s Zarathustra in his classic Ein Buch für Alle und Keinen, I want to turn conventional wisdom of the day on its head and lead you to a truth that goes against the current thinking.  If you want a happy life,  listen to some of the advice I give. It might feel unconformable and go against your grain, but I know what I am talking about.

    Categories
    Get a Wife or Husband

    Live abroad to find your wife

    This post will tell you how to move overseas to find a girlfriend or boyfriend.  I will also look at the pros and cons of living abroad, as an expatriate for love.

    I am the first to admit that my dating advice is radical. Nevertheless, it will get you married, I promise. I have know confirmed bachelors’ who swore they would never get married or could not get a girl, married in six months living in another country.  Although, I think online dating is good, better is to move abroad and find a girl or guy to marry. Its a mathematical axiom, as the online girls will be browsed about seven hundred views a month. The off line girls will have only you, and maybe some local guy who is working at a coffee shop hitting on her.

    The women you meet offline overseas with be different than the women online.

    Do you feel you will never get a woman for you, and never get married?  Join the club. I was that way.  I would metaphorically cry myself to sleep, thinking the world around me was wrong and that I could not attract women.  If you feel this way you are completely wrong.  You do not see your own beauty and power. You could attract almost anyone in the whole world with the right attitude.

    The truth is, laughter always sounds more perfect than weeping. Laughter flows in a violent riff and is effortlessly melodic. Weeping is often fought, choked, half strangled, or surrendered to with humiliation. – Anne Rice

    You have to ask God to give you the confidence and courage to believe in yourself and carry out your mission on this earth including finding the love of your life. Do it in a light-hearted laughing way, rather than weeping in self pity.

    What you tell yourself that prevents you from finding someone abroad:

    1. Too old – Bullchips, I was forty when I met my wife and I know guys older.
    2. Too shy – The way to break shyness is take small risks until you get use to taking larger risks.
    3. Divorced – Like half the people in the US. Hope wins over experience.
    4. No one fits your ideal – Try harder and read the Bible, unless you are perfect you have no right to judge. Take Yoga classes and learn acceptance or live your life as a strange old man.
    5. No money – Love and money are opposites, do you not know that by now?
    6. Not worth the effort any more – OK then, you have to accept you are neither male or female, rather some amorphous blob that does not have enough hormones to motivate yourself for mating.

    I moved abroad twice and so can you

    The first time in my early twenties, I quit my job at Chase Manhattan Bank on Wall Street and went to Europe. I was not looking for love. The second time, I quit my job in downtown Boston and left those nonsensical women behind.   I was forty and I met my wife in less than a month. Of course it took another six months to get her to go out with me.  If I can do it you can do it. Both times I came back better than my previous domestic life full of obsessions and self-pity.

    We are all condemned to live in our own self made purgatories – Mr. Spock

    You can free yourself from this situation you are in now, it is simply buy an airline ticket (I recommend one-way) to the country of your choice. If you do not know where, spin the globe and see where your finger lands.

    Living as an expat you meet normal healthy girls you would not meet online, who just want to get married.

    It is totally awesome and surreal living abroad. For example, One night I was thinking, here I am Friday night, in a club with women that look like Eastern European models and the guys back home are in cubes in their office living lives of quiet desperation.

    Domestic dating sucks so what are you waiting for?

    I do not need to rehash what you already know about the dating scene in your own country. Domestic dating sucks. It is a lot people who are not serious about staying together a lifetime. Rather, players and materialistic oriented self-seeking superficial people. So go abroad (leave the USA, UK or India or wherever your homeland is) and find a get the girl and live happily ever after.

    Oracle: Sorry, kid. You got the gift, but it looks like you’re waiting for something.
    Neo: What?
    Oracle: Your next life, maybe. Who knows?

    People are waiting for their life to happen with little risk.  News flash: Victory comes to the brave.

    Women online get on average 700 views per month. That is a lot of competition

    Pros of moving abroad to find a spouse

    1. Get the women (or men) that do not put themselves online  – Find the women that are off the dating sites. Find sleeping beauty and Cinderella rolled into one. The ones that nobody is looking for. The ones passed up by guys. The girls that do not see themselves as special, you think they are amazing. They might live in some anonymous big city in a block of flats or a village which is off the gird.  They perceive themselves as some ordinary girl that will never get a guy, and you come alone and are prince charming and sweep them off their feet. I want to be a prince charming and a knight who rescues the princess.  This is in contrast to girls who put themselves online and out there as marketable and ready to move. Who might be just as good, but I want to find the diamond in the rough.  I want to live a fairy-tale.
    2. As a foreigner you will be seen as someone different – I have seen guys and girls date singles abroad that only movie stars and models could date back home. The reason is we all add up to 100% and all have something lovable about us, but the domestic dating game does not take note of our uniqueness. The US places a inordinate emphasis on money, job status and a distorted view of looks.  We are all different and have unique characteristics that should be adored.  More superficially, if you are in shape and have a sense of style combined with intellectual curiosity you can have the mate of your choice abroad. Think of it this way. If in your school a Swedish female exchange student showed up, she would be the talk of the town. Similarly if you are a guy and move to Europe in a village, you will be popular, just because you are a novelty, and that does not wear off.
    3. You do not miss anything by leaving your country – What are you missing? Really a few BOGO specials on frozen pizza and ice cream, the next Neflix series? The 24/7 political commentary on the news and the perfectly watered and cut lawns of suburbia? The nasty unhumble attitudes of  people that make a little money here.  Come on, get a life, routine gets boring.
    4. Economic benefits of living in another country – I moved abroad before the economic crisis and moved back after. People were telling me my career would be ruined.  They were wrong. I missed the crisis and came out ahead economically of my peers who stayed behind.  My friends are underwater in the homes or just getting by. In contrast, the broadening of my resume was seen as innovated and a positive thing. I learned things my co-workers could never learned living abroad, including languages.
    5.  If you think it is too much effort – Consider how much of an effort it will be to marry the wrong woman and give her your house and half your money and let her crush your heart while she is riding some young buck.  Better is to meet a real woman face to face and who cares about religion.

    Contemplate the brevity of life and the measureless gulf of eternity that lies before and beyond – Marcus Aurelius

    What if you get stuck and just can not do it?  You say, maybe I will just go back to online dating. Sign up for six months of yoga and learn to bend and stretch you mind.  Practice yoga for six months or more at a good studio, like a Baptiste studio or Ashtanga, something thing will open your mind. If you do not know a place to do yoga, write me and your area and I will tell you which studio I would do in your area to get you unstuck.

    Cons of leaving the country for love and marriage

    There is a power in being powerless and anonymous.

    1. You have to deal with visa issues – You can live abroad for three to six month until you have passport/visa issues.  The solution is cross the boarder and renew it (does not work as well any more, but possible), or get a job at a language school  that will sponsor your work visa. Each major city has a consulate or an office of foreigners or department of immigration you can connect with.
    2. Money – Money who cares about money, are you absolutely nuts? Love matters, money does not.  Teach English, do Fiverr or get a consulting job trade in the market. It does not matter. I lived in poor countries abroad for a good part of my life and you can always make enough to scrape buy.  Am I a sleep under the bridge hippie?  No in the US I am an investment banker, but abroad I prefer to be nobody.
    Everyday is a vacation with the a slim foreign bride.

    Things to do before you seek love in Europe, South America or Asia:

    This advice applies if you are going for longer than six months.

    1. Quit your job – Best day of your life (until you get married). You get to tell your boss good-bye.
    2. Put you things in storage – Or give them away to a needy charity, as this is good Karma and a tax deduction.
    3. Sell your house or condo  – I am a Realtor I know what I am talking about. This is easy, I am flipping real estate all day long.  You can get another house when you return. If you can make a small profit take the money and run. If not rent it.
    4. Simplify your investments – Make them all quasi liquid in case you need them, except your retirement accounts.  Do not open a foreign bank account as it will make your tax situation easier to keep all funds US, just use your bank card abroad.  I only had bank card problems in the US not abroad.
    5. Get rid of your old clothes  and buy new – You want to look your best, so buy clothes from Hollister for your overseas adventure.
    6. Get in really good shape – Hit the gym and lose the weight, or do what you have to to lose weight, even if it is hot yoga twice a day.
    7. Learn 2,000 words – Learn a few thousand words in your new country using flashcards. I did this and could get by, and once you are there you will learn more. Do not worry about any grammar. Use Mnemonic tricks to remember your first 2,000 words. No one is good with languages, but use mnemonics and no grammar and you can learn what you needs. Memory words with association. You can not just remember something that is foreign, you need to associate it with something funny or strange. Access women that speak little English or do not use it professionally. If they are translators or tour guides or English teachers they get too many foreigners hitting on them and have inflated egos. Go for women that speak little English and do not want to be exported like a piece of meat back to your country.
    8. Write girls before you leave – But these will not be the ones you will date, they are just to flirt with online. Once you land go to a club and you will meet someone you will marry in six months.
    9. Find a flat – Use the local version of Craigslist or Gumtree or work with someone abroad to find the best deal on apartments to rent. Rent something small and cheap, your money will last. You can bike or take a tram to though the city and live a little like Jason Bourne off the grid.

    When you return to the USA:

    Bring your wife back – Do not leave her if you can. Always be together unless it is a real emergency. If you need to understand how to get a visa, read my article here:

    Rent or buy the cheapest place you can –  But do it somewhere new, not the same old worn out patterns of life. You can look here to compare different prices in the world and at home:

    This was created by a Polish programmer living in Ireland it is based on actual user input.

    • Also check out City Data Forum

    Turn your lawn into a garden – You have been out of the job market so you need to survive. We grow our own food.  I rolled back my yard and made it into a garden. This means you eliminate the biggest drain on disposable income, about $1,000 a month savings.  In my backyard I grow a few hundred heads of lettuce, about a ton of potatoes, herbs vegetables etc. Read a book on Urban Farming if you do not have land. You can do it.  Read Mortgage Free if you want a home.

    Be patient getting back into your work life – It might take time. That is why I recommend the above. Evaluate how much you make in your W-2 job and consider consulting. If you do not have the skills take some courses on Udemy and put yourself out there as a consultant. Try to get about 50 dollars an hour. You can always get a real estate licence, there is always something to do in the USA even in an area with no jobs.

    So my question is what are you waiting for? Why would you not leave your single life and travel the world to find the love of your life?

    What is more important your money or your life? Sitting safely in your philosopher’s chair browsing online profiles and chatting on Skype or living life and taking a risk.

    Avoiding danger is not safer than outright exposure to it. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing – Helen Keller

    If you think the dating scene in your country whether it be America or India or the UK is the best you can do, then stay there. But if you want a life of adventure with strange and exotic tale to recant when you are old consider moving abroad. I mean when you are in your 90s are you going to start living your life?

    Categories
    Get a Wife or Husband

    Marry a bad girl

    For love you want to find the bad girl who is good.   What does this mean?  You want someone imperfect, broken, twisted and seeking redemption.  I would prefer a female who is perverse and disproportional to a metaphorical perfect Pringle potato chip.  Why?

    Archetype of a bad girl

    What really is a dark side – The seven deadly sins – reconsidered

    When we lose our devils we lose our angels – Carl Jung

    It is the things that torture us and distort our vision and leave us grotesque (Sherwood Anderson) that make us interesting, rather than being Dead Souls (Gogol). Think of the introspective dark hero Lestat in the Interview with a Vampire series. You want a partner who is good in the moral sense at their core, but in the psychological sense, broken and striving for redemption.

    It’s an awful truth that suffering can deepen us, give a greater lustre to our colours, a richer resonance to our words. – Anne Rice

    1. Lust – excessive, inordinate  or misdirected love including promiscuous fantasies. I would rather date a ‘working girl’ who really believes in God, than a hyper consumptive material girl with a career who goes to church on holidays or is Christian, Jew, Muslim or Hindu in name only. Even in the Bible, Jesus was hanging out with women of ill repute, over the hypocrites with public respect.  Someone who has strange and exotic fantasies is someone who has high libidinal energies. These energies can channelled into creative endeavours and or reproduction.
    2. Jealously – Women who say, ‘oh he is jealous’, and jealous people are to be avoid. False. People believe that have no sense of what jealously really is.  Jealously (I am talking romantic jealousy) is a strong desire to have and want something for yourself rooted in reproductive drives to protect your mating material.  I want someone who is jealous about me and I am about them. It means I care and they care.  I love them and our love will be passionate.  If we are all cool about things, where is the spice and fun?  If people’s blood is not red than what is the point of having a commitment?  People that are not jealous I question their real level of commitment, they are the ones that will swap you out for another with time.  Women in the USA think men (I am talking about psychologically normal guys) are stalkers or possessive or jealous until proven emasculated.  Give me a jealous woman any day of the week over who suppresses their instinctual drives to possess her mate.
    3. Anger – Women have moods based on hormonal swings (you don’t say). It just means their juices are flowing, and you as a man need to be aware of that and ride out the storms.  Give me a women who throws pots over some dried up old librarian type any night. A woman with conflicted emotion and slightly neurotic is exciting don’t you think, as long as she is tempered by religion and knows not to leave you.
    4.  Sloth –   Work smart not hard. Laziness is an evolutionary advantage as it makes people use their brain to find a better way in life.  If possible avoid an unimaginative office worker/career woman. Better is a girl who wants to homestead, be an entrepreneur or use their brain to find some creative way, to channel her energy. Therefore, she has more time to spend with you. Is that not what love is? That is, maximizing time with the one you love.  I do not mean women who do not clean. You need a fastidious woman, rather a woman who likes to enjoy her life and use her brain in a creative way. For example, I knew a woman at my last job, who puts crazy hours in at the office, and then goes on cruises and plays games of chance. This is such a boring life.
    5. Gluttony  – Fat women are unattractive. On the other hand,  a woman who does not lust for appetitive consumption is not fun either. I want a woman who can cook food better than any restaurant, because she like I believes you do not waste a meal. If a woman can cook and loves to eat, she will make a good mother for your children. The trick is to find a girl who loves to consume and stays skinny. This is usually someone who is active and eats organic food.  For example, I do not restrict myself, yet, only eat home cooked organic food and stay thin.
    6. Greed – I despise material women, women that care about money and think love and money go hand in hand. Any woman that brings money into the love equation is a scammer. I do not care if she is from Russia or Beacon Hill in Boston. Yet the greed I am talking about is a desire to make your life better through creative productive efforts. If you want a house and do not have money look into Cordwood masonry.  I want a woman who can decorate even if she has no money. There is always a way to better your life. You want a beautiful life. A greedy girl makes life nice as long as she is the author of her own gilded castle rather than wants you to make money so she can have unlimited shopping.
    7.  Pride – This is in my mind the only sin.  Pride or lack of humility is the one show stopper for personal relationships. If someone lacks humility than it is hard for them to progress spiritually. Paradise Lost explains this as the primary reason people alienate themselves from love.  Dante’s Purgatorio details how this character blocks us from authentic love. I agree.  Best is to walk away from a prideful girl, rather than be there when she falls.
    •  Instinctively you know bad girls are baby makers. A twisted woman is good for reproduction and practising a lot. Carnal by its nature is a forbidden rebellious act, ever since Adam and Eve. If we are in this exile on earth, you might as well be honest and find yourself a beauty to enjoy it with. That is the whole point of getting married, to have a family. She should be miss Goody Two-Shoes after you are married. Therefore, when I talk about marrying a bad girl, I am really talking about marrying someone whose juices are flowing. You want someone struggling with their life, rather than born into wholeness.

    I’m at odds with everything and always have been. I have never belonged anywhere with anyone at any time. You sense my loneliness, my bitterness that I don’t deserve to be loved and yet I need love hungrily.  –  Anne Rice

    Someone with enough vitality and life-force, even if chaotic at time, to be able to do this task, that is bring your life to the next level.

    Archetype of a good girl

    American women falsely believe there are these cardinal criteria for a partner, and they are based on their understanding of psychological health. Wrong. I do not care if my partner is neurotic, OCD, ADD, depressed lonely or has fantasies that are bizarre.  Anima by her nature is an unconscious sensual contradiction.  As long as they are a peaceful good soul who humble themselves and lives a life of prayer, what do I care if they are incomplete and dark? In fact, if they are admittedly twisted this is slightly positive as at least they are honest.

    I want someone with an insatiable lust for life and is honest that they feel the existential anxiety of living and seeking redemption. Because it is only in love we can be redeemed. Someone not seeking love’s grace, has no chance to be beautiful. – Mark Biernat

    What you do not want in a wife

    What behaviour pop culture deems as signature of the dark side or bad women is not. If women have this behaviour it does not mean they are dark, it means they are to be avoided because they have tendencies to be boring or have real moral issues that lead to ugliness.  They will bring you down and destroy your life.

    What is not the dark side but just lack of brains or moral compass:

    1. smoking
    2. swearing
    3. cell phone addiction
    4. Facebook addiction
    5. man-made mind altering drinks or pills.
    6. slobs
    7. lack of intellectual curiosity
    8. lack of ability to make a lifelong commitment – this is a big one.
    9. lack of desire for kids or termination of a life before birth – this is a deal breaker.
    10. spends a lot or shopping at the mall.
    11. Tattoos – On hipster alternative people this can be accepted.
    12. does not cook and depends on packaged microwave food. – This person can be re-educated.
    13. talks or reminisces about her old flames – drop this girl like a bad habit
    14. career woman
    15. interest in Netflix type series on horror, criminal or Orange is the New Black type. Mindless shows that entice people into negative fantasies and distortions about real life.
    16. lack of faith – they need at least to be manifest actions congruent with an Unconscious God (Vickor Frankl).

    Marry a rose with thorns that will fulfill your boyhood fantasies

    When I was fourteen my childhood friend George and I would sit on a hill in Vermont in the evening and look at the stars and wonder who we would marry. What are future wives would look like.  I married that girl of my dreams.

    If you want to want to know more about where to find such women and the steps to get you to the alter and live happily ever after, read my blog.  I only give you the truth. I do not sugar coat things . Subscribe to my blog, share this and and like this on Facebook and you will get more beautiful photos and relationship advice.

    Categories
    Get a Wife or Husband

    How to pick up a girl for a dollar

    Picking up a girl for a dollar is the cheapest way to get a date, that works.  Have you ever spend cash on women? For example, taking them for dinner and it comes to nothing, because they are morally void (you did not qualify them enough for integrity before you asked to meet them for a date).  If you think buying a girl for a dollar is too much money, think about how much money you spend on Axe Cologne or Internet dating.  Here is a way to meet a girl, and screen her for morality on a basic level.

    In other words, if you use this pick up technique, not only do you get the phone number of the hot chick walking down the street, you see how materialist she is on an instinctual reflex reaction level.  Think of it as a sociological laboratory experiment, as well as a way to catch a girl. It is mostly a day game technique, but can be used any time.

    Get a girl to talk to you on the street with money

    3 steps to buy a woman for a dollar

    1.  Dress well, but not too well – In other worlds, use your Hollister clothes set, rather than Brooks Brother as you do not want the attraction to be about money.  Look your best. Anyone with hipster glasses, a nice hair style and clothes will get women. I am surprised at the number of guys that say ‘they can not get a girl’,  and yet they do not have a brand name shirt in their wardrobe.  Think about it, there is a whole industry that employs  creative geniuses to make the unlovable look hot, its called the fashion industry. Looks matter for guys and everyone can be at least an 8.
    2.  Walk down a street – It could be any street. The cost-effectiveness will be percentage no matter where. However, location of where you go fishing does matter. It matters what type of fish you catch. If you are going to a run-down area or what the PC crowd calls a ‘transitional area”, you will be getting one extreme.  In contrast, if you go to Town Center up scale  shopping you will get another crowd. Maybe the best is simply a place where your target pool of women reside, but you will not feel embarrassed trying to pick up women on the street. For example, if you like Polish girls, Chicago or New Britain, CT. If you like Russian women, Brookline, MA or better yet just any street in a tourist or beach town near you. You need a reasonable flow of traffic. Alternatively, you could try this get a date trick when you are abroad as your confidence level is up just by virtue of you being out the oppressive environment of American women.
    3.  Drop a dollar – Drop a dollar when there is a hot chick in the area. It should not be five dollars or ten dollars,  rather, just a one dollar bill.  Practise before you go and make it look natural. You could be in front of her as you are walking or browsing.  You can do some A/B testing to determine what converts better in terms of reaction by trying different techniques (for example walking versus window shopping).
    Simple trick to meet a girl for only one dollar

    Expected results

    That is it.  You are done.

    A. If she picks it up and pockets the money – She is selfish or materialistic. Move on, or ask her if she saw a dollar you just dropped on the street,  if you want to test her further.

    B. If she ignores the money – She is not compassionate or at least not enough to over-ride her primal fears. I want someone who can do this, that is be a good Samaritan.

    C. If she tries to return it –  This is the lady you want to talk to. She is socially responsible, brave and has some inklings of morality.

    Always choose the latter – choice C, and strike up a conversation. Brevity is the  soul of wit, enough conversation to to get her mobile phone number or ask her to dinner as a reward for her honourable actions. You can be talking in Edwardian English if you want to sounds like a gentlemen and request the honour of her presence as a reward.

    Alternatively, you could be empathic how nice that was and talk about how selfish and good people do exist.  Then build the rapport from there.  How is this different than in the classic time of courtly romance a woman would drop her handkerchief? It is all innocent romantic play if you ask me.

    Why this get a date trick works?

    Because, the emotions of finding money on the street are in a microcosm of a moral dilemma, and seeing money,  elicits emotion responses in women. This creates an opportunity.

    What if things go wrong?

    You will lose twenty bucks at most. Guys spend that on drinks at a club and do not get as much tête-à-tête face time with women. What if she calls you a scammer or freak, so what.  Yes, these are the same women that will do one-night relations with guys in bars after a few.  What if you get discovered by someone you know? You have to have thick skin to find a wife sometimes.  What if there are no hot chicks?  Change locations. What if there is an earth quake? Anything in life could happen, but never take counsel of your fears. You have to have guts to win a girl.

    Abroad women are more receptive

    This pick up trick works best if you are out of the USA. If you are abroad, it works like a charm. I have never tried it on domestic women.

    I do not like to objectify women like  sociological study.  However, this is a trick, that you can use to pick up women during the day, it is safe, non-threatening and they screened for materialism. If you can trust a person on a small scale you can trust them with larger things.

    Why use a dollar as your bait to reel them in? If you are in Latin America or India or Europe still use a US dollar Bill, because George Washington has more sensual appeal then a blue five dollar Canadian Wilfrid Laurier note. Local currency does not attract attention as much as a greenback.  This is because of the universality of the dollar and nostalgia people have for American and its gilded age.

    The strange relationship between money and women

    What is six inches long, has an abnormally predominate head and women love it?  A one hundred dollar bill of course. There is an unusual myth going on today that money increases libidinal desires for females to men.  It is a pop culture myth.  If a single female defines a man’s worth as the summation of his assets, or even cares about money for choosing a mate, I would remove her from my circle of friends.   Maybe Jersey Shore style women, but most true females care about love and compassion and gentleness. I never hung out with women that cared about money. I had money and did not have money and I would say there was a slight inverse correlation actually between income or wealth and attractiveness.

    Do you want to go for a rich career woman? I think no. Similarly, girls do not want to go for a business guy. If women introduce money into the equation, drop them that moment and never look back.

    Let me put it to you this way, is Trump attractive? My starving artists friends get phone numbers of hot women all the time. My out of shape business friends get no respect (and you do get out of shape living in a cube all day). Women go for  authenticity and interesting, including funny.  The above, trick to hook a girl is funny with imagination. You do not have to be rich just courageous as fortune sides with the brave.

    Categories
    Get a Wife or Husband

    Being single sucks – the cure

    Being single sucks and here is how to cure it. I know cure is a strong word, it implies being alone or unattached is a less healthy state. Forget political correctness, it is. It is not a disease but rather a dis-ease.

    Like the Beatles song Eleanor Rigby about  ‘all the lonely people’ … ‘no one was saved’.  I do not mean to be rude, but I want you to jettison all illusions. Being single in the long-run leads to depression or despair. You swindle yourself out of your own life. I write more about this here: Being single leads to depression

    Being single is a painful loneliness you think others do not understand

    The female coping mechanism for being single is to unite in something analogous to feral cat colonies,  gain weight and become boring (although they tell themselves they are becoming more interesting, wiser or more beautiful inside).

    In contrast, men start down a road of self destruction with drinking, corn addition (did I write corn?)  or being the old guy (but telling people they look much younger for their age) hitting on chicks and recycling cliché pick up approaches from when they were young and beautiful. At best they look like Rod Steward.

    In contrast the research suggests loving relationships make your happy, these are just two examples:

    • Love and happiness correlated
    • A 75 year long study currently run by Robert Jon Waldinger, M.Dof the University of Harvard supports the theory of a strong correlation between life happiness and being connected to others in relationships in contrast to being alone or alienate from love.
    People say being married is restricting to their lifestyle. I disagree, coupled with the right person you can explore the world together.

    Describing the common experience of loneness

    Look, we are all healing from the trauma of being brought up in a less than optimal childhoods, or being painfully rejected by a significant relationship, or never even having luck enough to have a normal boyfriend or girlfriend. We perpetually have the pain of  of being broken and lonely, until we find our other half.  This is how life sets us up.

    Further, there is life’s everyday struggles with money, health and anxiety.  Who can really have financial security today?  I live in the USA and it is hard, even in this ‘new gilded age’ (yeah right). Yet, of all of life’s struggles, being alone and alienated from love is unequivocally the worst. I can speak from personal experience.

    However, it is our singular mission in life to work our way out of our own ‘poor deck of cards’ we were dealt in life. Yes, we were all dealt a poor deck of cards. Everyone thinks, like the song  “Nobody Knows the Trouble I’ve Seen” (which originated during the time of slavery), that, nobody could understand the suffering and pain you go through in your life. I do.

    Self made purgatories

    I am sincerely sorry that you, the reader, have had to go through this pain or feel there is now way out.  I am sorry you are lonely and can not find your destiny. I went through this for years and would often metaphorically cry myself to sleep.  When I was single my life was a pendulum between ‘pain-self pity’ and asking ‘why’. Some people have a lot of dates and people interested in them, but are still painfully alone as they have not met the right one. Others, simply have trouble getting dates. It does not matter, the net effect is the same. You feel like the existentialist French philosopher Camus writes ‘ we are are gypsies on the edge of an alien world, a world that is as deaf or our music as it is to our sorrows’.

    I have no illusions. Being single sticks because if you are loved, than even in financial hardship and sickness your burden seems light. In contrast, when you are single you obsess about your parents, your childhood, your career, your body and face, and all the fears become manifest in a neurosis which you can hide from others, but not yourself. Be honest with yourself, this is the way you want to live?

    On a lighter note, people try body modification.  Even me, for example, I one time even bought and apparatus to do mouth exercises to make my jaw looked more chiseled and refined. It worked but my jaw hurt, I do not want TMJ. I considered pheromone based cologne, and this was the tip of the iceberg.  I thought there was something wrong with me.  Why am I single? It was like a dagger in my heart.

    The cure for being single

    Halfway in my life’s journey, I went astray
    from the clear path,
    when I awoke I found myself
    alone in a dark wood – Dante The Inferno

    There is a gender specific cure for loneness and a universal.

    The universal cure for loneness is being honest with yourself.  You have to admit to yourself you are lost.  Without your other half, you will slide into slight neurosis and unhappiness like a low grade fever. A painful alienation from clear path of life and this will gnaws at your soul as if you were lost in a dark wood. Do not worry there is a cure. There is a way out. I promise.

    The cure is simple. Be aware of this and be honest that you really want to be with someone and you will do whatever it takes to find your other half. For example, I left my six figure career to live off the grid in a far away land where I knew nobody.

    You have to pull out all stops. Realizes that no matter what the rationalization or ego defence mechanism you concocted, you can find a mate. No matter how many people in your past are freely renting space in your brain, you can forgive them. It is unhealthy to be single.

    It is not what evolution design you to be. You can find your destiny, and every cell in your evolutionary programming will reward you, as your genes will will have a chance at self replication by passing on your DNA.

    You do not want to become a batty old spinster or an old maid or that creepy fat guy that has extreme views or surfs corn (did I write corn again?) on the Internet and still thinks they are still in the game as a player.  You have to want to be married. You have to want to get married and stay married. You have to yield to the logic of the situation.

    That is, a million years of  evolutionary programming has created our brains to bond with another. The Bible write ‘ we leave our parents and cling to our spouse’ or ‘be fruitful and multiple’.  We must stop thinking like a child and reject this hyper consumptive post modern lie that you can play and be single. As years go by, you will become insignificant and fade into unhappiness if you stay single.

    Once you are honest with yourself and accept that being single sucks as it is contrary to natural law, than you need to muster the courage to raise above your self absorbed protection wall you created and seriously look for your other half.

    I want to be the impetus for you commitment phobic guys and per-spinster women in you late twenties and thirties to be honest with yourself and go for love, rather than what our society indoctrinated you with, that you can do it alone and focus on friends and career (what a joke).

    If you know the why in life the how is easy – Polemic Philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche

    Above is the why and below is the how.

    Incessant checking of your cell phone is not going to win the love of your life, rather develop and live for something greater, like religion and charity.

    The question is how to find your other half

    • Be Reptilian -You have to look hot. You need to be invoke semi-perverse fantasies in others when they see you.  It is in the imagination where the future unfolds.You can not afford to look casual. Wear things that will provoke the opposite gender get giggle like a school girl when they see you.
    • Evolve -You have to develop a disciple of self denial and spiritual progress. If you elevate your mind to a higher level, like Plato wrote “live with the gods”,. If you do, then people will instinctively find you appealing. They will not know why. The reason is evolution and survival of our species is about the brain and higher cortical functions as opposed to rabbits which just breed. I recommend Jacob Bronowski’s Ascent of Man if you want to think more about this subject. However, you need to appeal to your mate on a higher level or else you will just be a Jersey guy or girl. How many languages do you know? What is your Chess ranking? Can you play the Violin? Choose something beyond the convenient plastic wrapped food American lifestyle. Read books and cancel Netflix if you have to, but to get a mate who is quality develop yourself. Read  nineteenth century writer, William James’ book  The Varieties of Religious Experience to broaden your perspective of religion, meaning and happiness. It is non-denominational and  devoid of proselytization (yes I meant this word not the other).

    About how to be hot, I mention a number of brand name stores below because I am practical. Above is the philosophical underpinnings of why you are alone, below is the practical solution.

    For men and women:

    Beauty is about the eyes but raw attraction starts with the nose. Feed the most important organ in your body for mating:

    Human Vomeronasal Organ – Empty your bathroom medicine cabinet –  Yes today get rid of all the colognes, perfumes, make-up, and deodorants and soaps and shampoos. Replace them only with Wholefoods whole body products. The other products block pheromones. Petrochemical derived disposable consumer goods are not attractive but natural smells are. Think evolution and if you have pets what they do to each other, even if they are neutered.  Research Jacobson’s organ.

    As long as you are at Wholefoods, just buy organic food from there, and as little in packages as you can. Your skin will glow and you will look better. Be fanatical about a variety of friendly bacteria as this will deodorizes your of unappealing aroma. Go for consuming about fifty different types of strains.  Americans are fat because of the processed non-organic food they eat. My skinny European and Indian friends that move to the USA and eat the same type of good gain weight because it is lower quality non-organic.  Do not believe me? Try eating only organic WholeFoods non-processed food for a few months and watch the transformation. Your scent will change and your body will also. If you eat processed food you are putting off a foul scent for attraction. Read up on the Vomeronasal organ and draw your own conclusions.

    Get hipster or attitude glasses – Zenni will sell you some for under twenty dollars.

    Lose weight –  Strive to be at the lower end of the height and weight chart for a 25 year old no matter what your age. Enough said.

    For men – You have a style problem:

    • Clothes – If you are not dressing in Brooks Brothers clothes or at least Hollister if you are on a budget, then you will not get far. You have to dress up, even when you go for a walk or  HomeDepot. Dress for love,  like a movie star. Get in the habit of presenting your best. Give all your other clothes to a thrift store as it is good Karma.  Do not believe me? My friend George and I went to Montreal for a weekend trip.  I went clothe shopping and he stayed in his pick up truck reading a Louis L’Amour Western, while I went shopping at a French clothing store.  I wore those same clothes when I met my future wife. He is single today.
    • Hair- You have to go to an Aveda Salon and find an ‘artistic’ looking guy to cut your hair in a classic fashion.  No buzz cuts from hot chick hairdressers. Hair is a secondary reproductive organ, grow it in a longer side, think Leonardo Di Caprio in the film Titanic.

    For women – You have a style problem even bigger than men:

    • Clothes – You have two options, Preppy or European. Most women have no sense of style. I am sorry, it is true. You do not have to look like you are about to walk down a catwalk, but you have to look amazing. Think super tight jeans or a clean preppy look. Remember Mark’s mantra, ‘what girls think is attractive on their own gender is not attractive for a guy’. Study a natural, tight, clean, thin look. Think of the women in a science fiction series as a archetypal base for style. They wear tight clothes, solid over patterns, and look thin. Acceptible patters are thin pinstripe or perhaps plaid.
    • Hair – Most women are not putting themselves out there. For example, you have a ‘cute bob’ or shoulder length hair cut, it is so unattractive. Maybe your middle age woman friends will tell you it is , but I am a guy, it is not. Either grow your hair to the small of your back or cut it really short. Do not colour your hair unless there is a lot of grey. Spend money on conditioners and natural hair products.
    • Plastic is not fantastic – Do not consider surgical alterations of your body. If you must, adipose-derived stem cells from your own fat stores. Excess a
    • Be coy – Learn to smile and be shy and do not be opinionated. This is contrary to 90% of the women I know. Do not use vulgar words, rather speak with elegance. Read To his coy mistress by Andrew Marvell.

    Where to find your mate

    Travel. Forget people in a fifty mile radius on a dating site to couple-off.  That is lazy. The boy or girl next door does not exist. Spend your vacations, not on seven thousand dollar cruises where people pack themselves, or safe American cities, but go abroad on a shoe string. Be radical and travel alone (non-Middle Eastern because of the politics) foreign country and you will meet people.

    Fine a mate who is into an idealist subculture like permaculture

    If you must stay domestic, connect to subcultures like permaculture or Catholics or Christians or immigrants for example from Russia, Ukraine or Poland or elsewhere.  People who are consciously living a better life rather than Joe or Jane average. Consider people who go to Wholefoods or if you are a girl, sign up for chess tournaments or Greenpeace. Use your imagination to identify not interests, but rather behaviour that indicates people are aware and thinking of a higher ideal.

    Whatever you do, be radical and creative. You need to hold nothing back. Think out of the box. Write a comment or send me an email if you want to really more specific advice but, do something radical in a peaceful positive way, like quit your job and move to another country.

    If you really do the above then the next step is to look for a mate.

    No matter how different you think your situation is (this is ego speaking) others are going though the exact same thing in their own way. You are not alone. It is the human condition. Prayer for the other lonely people in the world, and for yourself. This will help. remember, we are programmed through a million years of evolution to pair off and mate. I believe in mating for life and not the hook up culture is the path to back to Eden. Write me in the comments or personally if you disagree or are about to read this and move on. Stop and think, do you really want to be pass from their world alone?

    • If you just wait for the perfect moment then life will passes you by. Yes that is exactly what happens. Want to get more motivation or advice? Write a meaningful comment and I will reply to your situation.
    Categories
    Get a Wife or Husband

    Women should be desperate

    Women listen up,  do you want a man, then be desperate. Be beautiful and desperate. Men love desperate, lonely beautiful women who will do anything for love and keep love. Don’t you love the cute puppy whimpering for affection? Loyalty, devotion and humility in a hot girl is pure temptation for any male.

    If you take the spirit of my words to heart you will find a guy in 100 days or less. If you are a guy reading this, it will give you a clue as to what kind of girl you will be happy marrying.

    Women are so far removed from their primal genetic instinct to get married and raise a family they would never be honest with themselves. I would rather do this on the side of the road than live as an old maid.

    The mating strategy of American women is a tragicomedy rather than a romantic comedy.  Let me explain, most single American women I am acquainted with, hit their 30s, then look for that last chance guy. Yet, in the same breath, they talk such nonsense, like, ‘I have so many amazing girlfriends that can not find a guy’.  My question is why are they amazing?

    Why single women in their 30s are not amazing but sad

    • Not hot –  What girls call ‘nice looking’ is not what men think is hot. Men and women have a different definition of what attractive is on a female. Do you want to know what hot is? It is slim, long not colour-treated hair, no tattoos, nor body/nose piercings (unless you are Indian), say yes tight jeans and a t-shirt or a dress, no make-up except natural lipstick and a novel or a language instruction book in their hands.
    • Too many pets and girlfriends – My wife does not have girls night out. I do not have boys night out. We did not have no pets. We have a family. Is that clear?
    • What cell phone addiction does to the female – The psychological principle ‘you get more of what you reinforce’ is fully in play with cell phone addicted girls.   Sadly many girls I know are mobile phone and Facebook addicts. Posting or texting every petty thought until all their thoughts are petty.
    • Quit your job – What they call their career is usually some stable quasi-clerical job, yet this is on their priory list up their with family. My message is quit your job if it is an impediment (and it usually is) to finding true love. Does not Jesus say this in the Bible? ‘If your right hand is your problem cut it off’.  It is a metaphor obviously for saying that if stands in your way of love than edit out of your life’s story.
    • Yawn -Not educated in the classical tradition of art, literature, history and languages, rather they have an eclectic politically correct agenda in their head that they annoyingly vocalize and will shout you down. Generic non nondescript women with no real interests beyond checking their pink iPhone are the ones their girls call ‘amazing’.
    • No humility – Pumped with the notion that ‘girls rule’ and men are kinda of mentally challenged, it is a huge barrier to over come.
    • Too many past relationships – They have been there done that with too many other guys and the experiences such as getting ice cream and sitting on a park bench is nothing more than a repeat of some past similar experience. The dating scene in the USA is something like Nietzsche’s idea of eternal recurrence.
    • Microsoft Project can not manage your life – when your biological calender tells otherwise.  Women in their 20s should forget about career and get a husband. If you are serious about your career and family, you are not serious about your family. Nature wants reproduction when a woman is biologically healthiest. I did not make up the rules. The hottest women start to lose their juice at a faster rate then men because of the decline in hormones. I am just saying your priories should not be on a Microsoft PowerPoint presentation or an Outlook calender, but rather in harmony with your biological calendar and a higher calling.
    • Girls lose their sense of style – I think this has something to do with a decline in hormones but their sense of style goes from Hollister and hot to a closet full of clothes and shoes and they look good only from a girl’s perspective.
    • Not slim – They weight way over 50Kg, more like in the 140s lbs.
    • Do not cook – They will say they make up for it in other ways ‘wink, wink’. I interpret that as, they are lazy and been there done that with a lot of guys. Not wife material.

    I could go on but what is the point?

    Pull out all stops and quit your job and go to Europe or wherever and find a husband. I would personally beg on the streets if it bought me the time I needed to find my true love.

    The real reason these girls not find a guy

    • A man as an aspect of life or true love? -The underlying reason American women have trouble finding a guy, are single moms, get divorce and generally cause drama for us men is, a guy is an aspect of their life.  In contrast, more often to a foreign female, love and family is their whole life.
    • They do not try desperate things – For goodness sake I know girls who wil not even try online dating. What the duce, you are in your 30s, you should put a sign out in front of your house saying, I am desperately seeking a husband.
    • Single American women, listen up, you should be desperate! – At the end of this post I have a solution if you are a woman a single, you can skip to it if you like.

    American women want to find that mythical work life balance. That is, career is critical for life satisfaction (as told in a droning mantra like fashion by the US media), but also balancing it with including’ girls night out’,  endless trolling of online catalogs and strip malls, time with their pets and ‘me time’.

    • I personally know a lot of 40 year old career women that have not found the right one. That is tragic. Being an old maid is nothing to be proud of.
    • Better is to realize the pain of loneliness is a call to action.

    Love has no limits.

    How is that not clear? Love is dissolving and losing yourself in your beloved. In the words of St. Thomas Kempis:

    Anyone who is not willing to suffer all for your beloved is not worthy to be called ‘lover’.

    In the triple sense Hegelian word aufheben, one is annihilated, merged and lifted to a higher unity.  This is love.

    In contrast, I believe you should die for love. You should surrender your whole self including your career and friends and everything. All or nothing, play to win like there is no way back.

    Be honest with yourself, don’t you want love? Then do whatever it takes to find it. If you have questions ask me.

    What American women should do

    Be desperate.  Hold a sign out on the side of the road that says ” Husband wanted”.  Put a sign out on your car instead of “Just married”, “I want to get married now, please help”.

    If you are single give up your career, move to Europe (I did, I was high up in corporate America), live poor, find a guy. Dis your friends and girls night and hunt for a man.

    How to be a strong woman -Women read books on Running with the Wolves and being a huntress wild woman, and standing up for their rights, my message is channel that female Neanderthal primate instinct energy that nature through a million years of evolution has honed and developed into finding a mate and reproducing and finding love in a Godly sense of the word.

    When you find him love him, do anything for him.  Beg him to stay with you, so if he is walking out to go to work, you are being dragged by his ankles and greet him with a nice outfit and a smile when he gets home. Tell him you will raise the kids and not complain and do anything he wants. Never ever divorce him,  follow him anywhere.  Lose weight and learn to cook. Be humble and understand how self abasement is a good thing if you have pride.

    Sound  like bad dating advice? Its not. Once you find your guy life will make sense and your years of semi-depressed existential wandering will be over.

    P.S.  I have personally done the male equivalent of the above.

    Categories
    Get a Wife or Husband

    101 reason why Ukrainian citizenship is better than Russian citizenship

    It is better to be a Ukrainian citizen than a Russian citizen. The Ukrainian model of government is a superior model to the Russian model of dictatorship.  Russians that do not see this are fools. Democracy and free markets is  superior  for a civilization because it is based on freedom and human dignity and this motivates people more than some quasi-dwarf like  political egomaniac like Putin.

    Lets be honest here! Putin is a traitor to the good people of Russia by making Russia look like a Machiavellian aggressor in the international community and denied the average Russians true free market economics.  It is shameful.

    Free Market always wins over Dictatorship. For example, free market and democratic powers has trumped dictatorship and controlled economics in every case in history. It sometimes takes a while, but think of the central powers in WWI or the Axis powers in WWII or the Soviet Union and its collapse.   The collective unconsciousness of the world is evolving and people do not like the nonsense of Czars and control over their personal lives.

    Russia right now has the upper hand because it has military. But eventually the Russian economy will collapse and Putin will be gone. The Russian economy is very unstable because of the artificial non-market mechanisms in place.  Ukraine on the other hand, will move more towards the West, get Western aid and eventually be like Poland, and economic miracle.

    • Who would you rather be a Russian peasant ruled by Czar Putin, and I mean the average Russian, or a Ukrainian who will eventually be part of the EU who has the opportunity to work and study all over Europe?

    What about Putin?

    Putin is a dictator whose days are numbered.  He will lose power now. Two years ago I publicly predicted (on this blog) Russia will take over part of Ukraine, and people laughed. Now I predict Putin will lose power. The guy is no good. He keeps Russians down in their place with psychological manipulation based on nationalism but he is really about feeding the oligarchs.

    You can say Karma or the universe but Putin is a goner. He has made Russia look like a lying, thieving country. His controlled economic model is inferior to the free market and true democracy. It is based on export of one commodity, oil, like the Arab economic model of Europe, Russians have and elite and everyone else.

    This post tells why and gives specific examples, rather then generalities. If you are reading this, have no illusions Putin is evil.  Do you support Putin? Then you support evil, that makes Russia look like a bad country. Read on below as I make my case.

    He has disgraced the good people of Russia by showing the world that the government of Russia is lying, murderous, thieving that goes back on its words, sell arms to terrorist, and violates human rights.

    Good people of Russia, Putin steals from your work and honor while you live like District 12 . Remember the film/ book “Catching fire” by Suzanne Collins – Think about the parallels between, President Snow and Dictator Putin. He takes from your future economically and your soul as a Russian.

    Not the Russian people mind you, but the Oligarchy of Vladimir who goes back on its promises and written words.

    How is the Russian government not a liar?

    Here are specific examples of how Putin discredit the good people of Russia by going back on its word.  Psychologists have said  say this former KGB agent’s forked tongue is evidence he is pathological.

    • Treaty between Russian and Ukrainian 1990 for acknowledging boarders and cooperation.
    • Verkhovna Rada adopted the Declaration of State Sovereignty of Ukraine 1990.
    • Belavezha Accords 1991 treaty on friendship, economics and boarders between the Russian Federation and Ukraine.
    • Another treaty in 1997 signed by The Russian Federation 1999.
    • The Trilateral Statement: Signed in the Russian Capital in 1994 which said it would respect Ukraine boarders by the presidents of the United States, Russia, and Ukraine: Bill Clinton, Boris Yeltsin, and Leonid Kravchuk.
    • Barack Obama and Dmitry Medvedev, confirmed the assurances of security to Ukraine and boarder in 2009
    • Most terrorist weapons in the world are from  Russia. Take the Kalasnikov  or the AK47 or the RPG7

    Russian  Vladimir Zhirinovsky politician sent letters to Poland, Hungry and Romanian to partition Ukraine. This was prompted by Putin (rumor) to cause weakness in the West, but denied officially.

    Apparently the International community let him get away with it.

    101 reason the Russian government is dishonest to support Putin is shameful

    1. Putin makes Russia looks like a lying thieving country. Russian President signed three treaties in exchange for regulation of nuke would stay out of Ukraine and respect the boarders. And you know what the USA signed this too.
    2. Dostoevsky said “Why not lie cheat and steal if it is to your own advantage” the novel “Brothers of Karamazov”. Think of Napoleon or H__ler to any leader that does this, their power fails. His cold heart ed plays are sociopath. The world does not want a sociopath as a ruler and their power always ends.
    3. Karma – He steal from the Russian soul. If you know Russian history you know the concept of the Russian soul.
    4. Oil – Its about oil. Crimea has oil and Putin does not want his Oligarchs monopoly on importation of oil to Germany and the EU weaken by a free market.
    5. Even Obama called him weak. And Clinton called him like H_tler, this tells you something.
    6. Russia should break apart – Look at the demographics of Russia, the people of Rus are becoming the minority. There should be elections in the Russia and every people that want to break away should be able to. Only Moscow would be left. Most of Russia is Asian. It would be a head without a body if Putin’s hypocrisy was applied to his own country.
    7. Gary Kasparov one of the smartest people in the world clearly sees the nonsense.
    8. Police state – Puts people in jail that try to run against him or his friends.
    9. EU freedom or Russian puppet? – It is obvious Ukraine wants to be a free and a wealthy EU nation.
    10. The roads would be paved with gold in Russia – if it were not for Putin rich take all economics of exploitation rather than capitalism for the middle class. More stratified than before the Russian revolution.
    11. Putin, stage attacks in Moscow and Russia on Russian people to drum up support. This is unsubstantiated but reasonable theory and evidence.
    12. Moldavia is next.
    13. Belorussia is next.
    14. Ukraine as a whole is next.
    15. If he could Putin would take of Europe then the world.
    16. Oligarch’s greed will start looking for a better puppet.
    17. Russian economy on the brink of collapse wanted a ‘little war’ to manipulate primitive Russians to march to the drum of nationalism for his only glory.
    18. Terrorists he supports do not like him. He sells them arms but first chance they get they will turn on him. Like the Ancient Roman’s bribed the barbarians to stay away, but eventually they could not resist.
    19. Uses WWII type disharmony and manipulation.
    20. T3 treaty signed.
    21. Suppressed dissidence and free exchange of ideas.
    22. Birth rallies sign of falling birth rate of ethnic Russians.
    23. No free elections – lets be honest it is all a lie.
    24. No free speech
    25. Astrological predictions  say Putin days are numbered, no pun intended.
    26. Bible prophesies have called Putin the anti-Christ who will be defeated. He is bad as his actions have resulted in lose of life, but I do not think he is that evil, more a minor evil. God protect us.
    27. At 5 feet tall and 4 and 3/4 inches he has some serious health concerns over him. Although both his parents lived to like 90 he has other issues.
    28. Vladimirovich keeps Russians poor ideology – Free movement of labour and capital make countries rich, Think present and past examples, North Korea Vs South, think Mainland vs. Hong Kong, East Berlin vs West Berlin. Russia does not have free market it is an imperial oligarchy, think Darth Vadar.
    29. Dmitry Medvedev is no better and it tell you that Russia is not choosing good leaders.
    30. Putin keeps Russians poor reality. Average Russian finds it hard to buy a 50 meter (500 square foot) apartment in a Russia, and I am talking a concrete block. Any Russian can you tell me life is easy in Russia?
    31. Wants to keep Ukrainians and Russians living in Ukraine away from prosperity and freedom of the EU.
    32. False god. Puts himself out there as a father of Russia but manipulates
    33. Anti religious – When the Pope told mobsters eternal punishment awaits them he could have been referencing the Oligarchs and Putin also. He pretends he is religious but a true religious person would be a warrior of peace. He manipulates people by pretending he is religious.
    34. Blocks websites that he does not like
    35. Creates crisis’s – with flying in military that look like gangsters backed by prepared civilians to look like protests.
    36. Tries to provoke other countries into war.
    37. Alaska could be threaten as it is rumored.
    38.  Len Blavatnik, Eugene Shvidler, Konstantin Kagalovsky, Abram Reznikov,  Leonard Blavatnik are examples of Oligarchs that are connected to Putin, if their power is weakedned by Putins foolishness things will change.
    39. Did Russia down the plane of the Polish President? It does not sound too far fetched now. The crash was caused my a mysterious explosion.
    40. I always been a supporter of Russians but the government is a dictatorship that does not support the Russian people, only an elect few.
    41. Every election is a fraud, including the Crimean. Think about the days of the Soviet Union when over 90% of the election was for one party. Tartars and Ukrainians are almost 50% in Crimea.
    42. Ukrainian country as a whole would have to ratify the treaty of succession if Crimea wanted to, not just a rigged election.
    43. Swapped his wife out – what happened to true love? The guy is a traitor.
    44. Just likes to cause trouble for bravado.
    45. Blood on his hands. Few things you can do in their earth that will jeopardizes your immortal soul. Taking a life is one of them. Putin has done this with military intervention many times.
    46. Destroys the environment.
    47. Sell weapons to the world.
    48. Moscow created the Ukrainian holocaust in the 1950.
    49. Moscow destroyed the Tartars in Crimea.
    50. Russia supports corrupt unfair officials. If you have ever been exposed to injustice you know how it feels. Putin does this on a grand scale.
    51. Enlightenment never made it to Russia as ideals of Adam Smith (vs Mercantilism) and free speech and democracy are foreign to Russia, Putin prevents this. Perhaps he is afraid.
    52. Putin fits every incarnation of evil. is he President Snow from the Hunger games, or Darth Vader from Start Wars or Valdimor from Harry Potter or Gulleim from Lord of the rings.
    53. To invade another country and annex it today, is a primitive leader from another time when mankind almost destroyed itself.
    54. If Russia is the third Rome, Roman glory was under the republic and fell under the empire. Putin will destroy what is known as Russia.
    55. Putin has nukes and could destroy all humanity, he is unbalanced and our world would be left be gone.
    56. Putin is wooden looking, perhaps some physical deterioration that affects his judgment, not a make you want to have in power.
    57. Democracy is sustainable then a concentration of power.
    58. Bad people in control, It is concerning that, bad people amass power.Even if currently only in Russia, these bad people will control businesses and people in other countries including the USA. It is called influence. Imagine if strong men amassed great wealth and power. What would prevent them from doing anything they want eventually? Therefore, it is in the interest of the USA to stop it.
    59. Specific people who oppose Putin, the list is endless of intelligent people.
    60. Does not move Russia forward in any way. Compare something like the San Francisco bay area, of progressive open-minded creative people.  Compared to Putin’s cloak and dagger, rigid minded, Machiavellian power plays.
    61. If Russia was so good Sergio Brim would run Google in Russia rather than Sunny California. There is limited creative expression in Russia.
    62. Putin’s health issues: Manifestations of weakness are his rigid body postures and the way he moves. Shows evidence of weakness or deterioration of his. If you notice the way he walks and turns his body it is not like a teenager or agile functioning human but more like a robot or an old man.
      I have to give it to him; he keeps in shape and takes care of himself. I hope he lives over 10o as I wish nothing bad on anyone. That being said he has a few genetic red flags that could cause him problems.Putin is not a Christian. – Russia is or once was a Christian nation, but no more. Putin claims to have had a religious experience after a car accident. But the Bible says ‘A tree is known by its fruit’. He lies cheats and steal if it is to his advantage. He uses religion to manipulate good people.  When one uses religion to manipulate this is a special kind of darkness.
    63. Good always wins over evil, don’t you know that?
    64. Most Russians secretly would rather not have Putin in power. They are afraid to voice this. Why would they want someone supports the Oligarchs more than the Russian people. The Russian language is more universal than ethic Russians. Like the English language is not about the people of England.
    65. Delusional – He thinks is a patriot but he is not. He thinks is restoring the grandeur of Russia to the Czarist old style kings of yesteryear. In the 21st century people want freedom to live normal lives with their families not Czarist worships.
    66. Nationalism is a 19th and 20th century idea that caused wars in the 100s of millions of lives. Putin wants to replace Christian and Humanistic values with Nationalistic values and try to make the Russians people believe this is good. Maybe a few naive people would fall for this. But most find it troubling.He is not. He might be like Ivan the Terrible but not like Peter the Great.  Peter for his time was open to the West. Ivan was a paranoid expansionist. If Peter the Great were alive today, a true Russian patriot be thinking of the common Russian and enlightenment, not the Oligarchs and greed and power.
    67. History of Russia – From the beginning of Moscow to the revolution and Stalin control of the Russian people there was a believe that ‘knowledge was power’ and Moscow strategy was to to convey a truth that was distorted and limited. Now with the Internet people have access to more of the truth even if Putin bans websites, maybe even this one from .ru world. Still the truth gets out.
    68. Increasing awareness. Human consciousness and evolution is changing in ways that people do not realize. Genes of primitive hunter – be the king or top of the pyramid is being replaced by cooperative genes. This is really happening. The reason is because nature, a power much greater than us, is replacing primitive men like Putin with more global thinking leaders and people. I could write a book on this. But Bill Gates is eons wealthier than any Russian Oligarch. Nature will not allow Putin type people to continue or the human race would not survived.
    69. What if the whole world acted like Putin?  The world would be destroyed.
    70. Putin is a small minded bully, not a clever thinker like many people think.  I have never known a real bully to succeed in the long-term in life. Most wiseguys wind up in jail or checked out reality early in life, whereas Warren Buffet is still around.
    71. Putin is like a Middle Eastern Sheik. Putting his bet a one dimensional oil based economy.
    72. Putin Without Oil there would be an economic collapse and it would be a 19th century country. Whenever you develop an economy like that, it can not sustain itself for long. The would will find alternative forms of energy and sources and that well will dry up with nothing to show except a few rich Oligarchs.
    73. Demographics will continue to make Russia less Russian and there will be less glamor to a ‘Russian Czar’ as opposed to just a real leader representing the people.
    74. EU and USA economic sanctions will hurt Putin’s power base. He will not show this to the world but it will erode the ability to generate power.
    75. Global cooling – Not a fact but the trend seems to be flat for global warming over the last 17 years accounting to NOA satellite data and potential down if you believe that the Sun has something to do with the temperature of the earth (Solar Minmus). The net effect on the Russian economy will be severe. Dictators only retain power when things are good not when people can not grow crops and pay their bills.
    76. Matruska doll – Layers of hidden faces know one knows the real Putin.
    77. Putin was KGB and his father a devout atheist and communist. Is that the makings of a man you trust?
    78. Military is outdated. Not state of the art like the USA. Free market democracies have always progressed faster than dictatorships with military innovation. Look at WWI and WWII who one? Look at Ancient Rome, its glory days were in the time of the republic and the the Ceazer brought it down. A concentration of power makes a feeble country.
    79. Choose a metaphor – Power corrupts. Lord of the Rings or any story of power, it never ends well for the dark leader. These are not just fairy-tales they are reflections of a greater reality.
    80. He will exile Russia from the world community. Continuously irradiating peace loving nations and will result in alienation.
    81. The best people from Russia will continue to escape and the brain drain continues. Why would someone who is not connected want to stay in Russia while the West with all its freedom and opportunity awaits. There is exciting opportunity in terms of science and space exploration. Russia you will have limited creative expression.
    82. He has unleashed too many bright Ukrainians and people from the republics he opposes to topple his power in new creative ways. I am talking non-violent and peaceful but just as effective.
    83. Divorced his wife of thirty years Lyudmila, that is not loyal, he is a traitor.
    84. Alina Kabayeva
    85. Valery Nikitin
    86.  Monastery in the region of Pskov – Elizarova monastery – like Ivan the Terrible, and his wife’s exile.
    87. Putin is gay rumour is curious because his government is notoriously anti-gay. Often when people have this tendency they go in the closet by going and speak against it. Check out putindressup.com.  The guy kissed a young boy in public. That is  Putin fact.
    88. Weak Russian Ruble will show Putin to have blundered in Ukraine.
    89. Ukrainians could hatch a clever scheme to undermine his power. Often to be at an apparent disadvantage is powerful. There are infinite number of things that could be done to stop Putin without military.
    90. I mean Putin could get Lyme disease or something with all his outdoor activities.
    91. GOP will win and a stronger American leader will cause him the son of Vladimir Spiridonovich Putin to back off and back down.
    92. If Ukraine ever had a guerrilla war again Putin it would be a disaster for Russia.
    93. George Soros said Putin is acting out of desperation now as he is unpopular in Russia and the world sees his evil in Syria and Ukraine. It isolated Moscow.
    94. Does not smile for a reason, fear.
    95. Even Sarah Palin predicted he was trouble.
    96. Loves animals and kisses babies as a form of manipulation, people start to see though this.
    97. Stole Robert Krafts Super Bowel ring, that is crazy.
    98. People see him as a saint, and he does not publicly deny this, this is crazy.
    99. Putin wins more votes than actual number of voters, another fact to prove he is a liar.
    100. Hot Russian girls like the punk group Pussy riot oppose him as well as Ukrainian group Femen. Hot chicks know an low life when they see him.
    101. Putin’s Labyrinth: Spies, Murder, and the Dark Heart of the New Russia – by Steve Levine goes into detail of how Putin is evil. Good always in the long run wins over evil.
    102. Words and ideas are always more powerful than military or political power. The world is a war of ideas. Putin’s idea of greed for a few at the expense of humanity will not be allowed by the collective unconsciousness of the people of the earth.
    103. He who lives by the sword shall die by the sword.
    104. Putin is mostly just a loser in life, as defined by who? God, humanity, classical understanding of good and bad most of the world, his ex-wife, most of the Russian people although they are afraid of him.

    Why did Russia do this to Ukraine? Oil war

    Putin is losing power at home as the economy falters, like a fading rock star he needed a publicity stunt.  H_ler started WWII because his power was waning a bit and needed to retain power.  A little war is good for dictators.

    Putin like an aging Madonna taking off her clothes was doing a desperate move to get people talking again.

    Russia wants Crimea to be part of Russia not Ukraine. Why? Oil. Oligarchs need oil the money and power consolidation. Crimea has shale oil and other resources off shore. It would undermine the Russian monopoly on energy.

    Why is this crazy that Russia wants Crimea?

    Because there are many Polish people that live in Chicago so that means this should be part of Poland? Or Florida should go to Cuba? Or Quebec should go to France? Hong Kong should go back to the English? If Putin, um I mean Russia was consistent in its logic then half of Russia would break apart.

    Ukrainian not Russian Crimea

    Crimea is and has been part of Ukraine not Russia. International boundaries were agreed on. It is contiguous part of Ukraine. Russia wants to take it over and I think because the USA is so focused on saving Iraqi oil, um I mean people, they turn their backs on the politics in Eastern Europe, except Moscow, um I mean Russia. They always have. Russian wants to occupy Crimea with warships etc,  like it holds all these countless other republics that are of economic or military interest to them. The Russian fleet is already in Crimea and the Ukrainian president wants it out. The major of Moscow Yuri Luzhkov (a Putin puppet), has public declare that Crimea belongs to Russia. Russia is an imperialistic Czardom.

    I predicted that Russia would invade Ukraine, specifically Crimea, in two years ago. Everyone laughed at me.

    Russian people

    I love the Russian people. I love Russia. I love Russian culture. I am 100% Slavic in blood and live in Eastern Europe and travel to Russian, Moscow and Ukraine. But I am just telling it like I see it. Gary Kasparov one of the brightest minds in the world sees it this way too, that Russia is no democracy. And the Russian people are suffering because of this.  Muscovite’s who have power get rich, while the Russian citizens get marginally better lives, just enough so they do not complain to much, however, if Russia had true democracy and free movement of labor and capital and gave up its imperialism it could be an extremely dynamic place, not just Moscow.

    Crimea is Ukrainian not Russian

    Crimea is part of Ukraine and Russia should not try to take it over. Putin crossed the line. Kiev was the original Kievian city of the Ancient Eastern Slavic people, and Russia has violated this, and the wheels are in motion to reverse this. People are praying for Putin’s fall from power.

    The Russian leader Putin is really not a strong leader.  He is all about power, absolute power and his money hungry oligarchs bow to him.  But a true leader would care about humanity, including putting young soldiers, Russian and Ukrainian at risk. A free movement of labor and capital as well as the democratic process.

    Mark my word, Putin will be gone from power because of the forces at work in the universe already in motion.

    I have to give the Ukrainians credit they were provoke but showed great restraint. The Russians wanted battle. But if you think about it, if you take one human life your soul is in jeopardy of going to hell and the Russian soldiers who tried to provoke this has their judgement waiting for them.

    So in the end Russia seems like it is winning now but the truth always comes out and Ukrainians will enjoy a freer more economically stable future than Russians. Russians.  I would rather be a Westward leaning Ukrainian and the a Russian subservient to Moscow’s nonsense.

    Categories
    Get a Wife or Husband

    Is it better to go it alone or with a partner?

    When traveling through time and space is it better to follow your every whim and desire unfettered? Do I like to play life by my rules and have it my way? Absolutely.

    Or is it better to have a partner, which comes sacrifice and compromise? Someone to watch to watch my back for me when things get hot. Someone to breath new courage in my when my own heart fails.

    When the heat gets hot you need someone to watch your back for you, a partner. This is an actual unaltered photo I shot from my car window in one of my travels with my wife.

    I have done both. My verdict is unequivocally, a partner is eons better, no comparison.

    Every globe-trotting player/gentlemen traveler or Indiana Jones adventurer I know would ultimately starts to self destruct or falter if they do it alone. Some have good runs and enjoy their illusionary freedom and hedonistic romps, however, in the end something happens.

    Do you think being single is cool, think again. I have universally seen my confirmed bachelor former wing-men fade away not so gracefully, women even worst.

    For example, one of my friends is a drinker, another a gambler another caught a disease despite extreme precautions, another somehow after a life of being skinny and fit got fat and bald almost overnight. Girls self destruct even faster because they fade into obscurity as the new crop of twenty something women catch men’s eyes.

    It is almost like nature has programmed humanoids  that fly solo through their life for self-destruction.  Even if you do Zen meditation and eat right, it seems something in the fabric of the cosmos starts to tear around you, unexpectedly. I can not explain. I see it over and over again. The arrogance of youth is trumped by life. I used to think people who were sick were had a mental problem or did it to themselves. How naive I was, even if there is a causal relationship from your spiritual body to your physical body it is not one to one.

    From an evolutionary perspective among primates children of monogamous parents have greater protein and protection and their parents DNA has a greater chance to proliferate in the future and do great things.

    In contrast the evolutionary ‘spread your seed’ folks seem to have offspring that have a difficult time in life. Only with the help of a social state to these people survive.

    The newest research supports monogamy as the choice current in evolution.

    From a Christian perspective monogamy and staying with your spouse is clear.

    To get married or not to get married?  – that is the question

    Being married and monogamous is the way to be

    • Courage – Your wife will instill courage and check your moral compass in check in a way that in congruent to your ideals.
    • Proverbial rolls in the hay are one of the main reason to get married – You will get a lot more physical action. Unless you have complete control and access to a full-time night girl you can not keep up with married people who can do it all the time. My mantra is find someone who you are hot for, and really is from your boyhood fantasy. She does not have to be the perfect Photoshop Cover Girl, you would pleasure yourself to in say Self Magazine or your favorite girly website. Rather she has to just have that ‘je ne sais quoi’ for you.
    • It is not about being happy – Viktor Frankl – I was getting a haircut at your local strip mall place this weekend and my stylist was hitting on me. Besides the fact that I am married, I have no idea in what dream world she thinks she could snag me. She is divorced and looking for a sugar daddy (I do not make that much). She explained to me, like all American women explain to me, they just were not that happy in their marriage/ relationship. She said she got one of those turbo divorces in two weeks.  My rebuttal is, marriage is not about being happy, nor is life. You are here to be humble servants of God. You stay married in sickness and in health and happiness and unhappiness and through this experience a higher meaning is revealed to you. I am not casting judgement on those who have made youthful trivial mistakes and have no children, but those who have a family. Life has a quality that goes beyond happiness, it is called meaning. I recommend Viktor Frankl’s book ‘Man’s search for meaning’.
    • Complex stratification of reality – Unless you are base because your brain has atrophied from checking your mobile phone too often or you are culturally deprived from being a latchkey kid and parents did not care enough about you to guide you to higher ideals or you waffled in Woody Allen type existential anxiety and perpetual adolescence, eventually you will find you need transcendence. Every human needs transcendence. Being a peaceful warrior mystic monk gets old after a while. In contrast being married does not if you catch the right one.
      I have been my wife for years and daily, when I least expect it, I make quantum leaps and discover new aspects about life and existence I could never have single. These are usually manifest in experiences rather than something I could convey.
    • Male female schism – Have you ever gone into a chicks place and noticed how nice and comfy it looks. Contrary to all this talk about man caves etc, guys like nice Martha Stewart/ Coastal Living type places, they just do not have the time or focus to make it so. When you have a partner you place looks great. You might want to revisit the Star trek episode ‘Spock’s Brain’.
    • Money –   In contrast to being single, being married and monogamous seems to have rewards not talked about often, that is monetary. If you have read Napoleon Hill’s books, few single people really are successful in life because they dissipate their libidinous energies. Napoleon Hill was commissioned by one of the kings of capital of Old to study why some men succeed in life while others fail. Being partnered has a lot to do with it.
    • Safety not guaranteed – If you want a quirky movie to illustrate some of these points I recommend ‘Safety not Guaranteed’.
    I have only had good experiences being married, because I threw my net around my wife and captured her.

    The bottom line is: As you travel through time and space you want to have someone to watch your back for you when the heat gets hot. If you do not understand this I can not explain it to you. Perhaps you have not really lived or faced certain death. If you want to unplug from your adolescent illusions, walls and rituals that protect you and live as a man, try getting married. You just have to capture the right one and it will all be OK and your real life will begin.

    If you need advice on how or why to break the cycle of being single or question why you need to, leave a comment. If you like what I have written share this post. I think it benefits others to hear the truth about partnership from someone who has been around the world and back and has some perspective.