Central European courtship gone awry
Many guys think Hungarian girls are beautiful and educated. Those are the pros. The con is they are too liberal for my taste, incongruent personal views are like mixing oil and water.. You want to date them, fine, good for you. My review of these ladies is before you consider them for marriage think not just about their physical beauty, but their personally and the way they see the world. That is how has post communist society where their psychosocial profiles was form has influenced their world view. If you are going fishing in Hungry try Christian dating or Catholic church organizations or through acquaintances that can recommend you to someone who has a healthy view of love, marriage and family.
- I lived in Eastern Europe and saw the transformations with my own eyes. Read my lips, the society which a person grows up in affects the parameters which they act out their free will. I am not a strict cultural determinist yet, the collective unconsciousness of a society can not be over looked.
- According to EuroStats the official statical site of the EU, 42.3 percent of all Hungarian births are out-of-wedlock.
- According to Eurostat the Crude marriage rate in Hungary is 3.6 per 1,000. That is low, even if it is the crude marriage rate.
- The Divorce rate is 67% according to the UN statistical division.
- I can provide further reference from authoritative sources if you like.
Let me say there is nothing wrong with Hungarian girls. It is the pendulum of social interaction as it relates to male female relationships. Further, if you are Hungarian, and do not like the way the social pendulum has swung, do something about it. Start a movement to counter this in your country.
Specific example of behavior I have encountered
- My friend Ed dated a girl, brought to Church one Sunday and she would not even kneel when other people were, and in the middle walked out in a storm and a huff, because she said what was being said was ridiculous, they were talking about home schooling.
- My friend Steve, was dating a Hungarian girl and she said, she use to love her past boyfriend very much but their relationship was cool and not expected to replace those feelings.
- My friend David, dating one and she had become pregnant and did not know who the father was.
- I knew a girl who was Hungarian at the school I worked at, She was exceptionally nice. A class above.
- I have had scores of women debate the point with me why get married, it really does not matter any more. They love their boyfriends and have kids with them, what is the big deal. It is a big deal as it perpetuates a society of whatever non-committal relationships.
So not all are negative with these ladies, except some of the liberal ideas. Yes, they are pretty and will charm your pants off, but I guess I am not attracted to them because some of them have adopted non-traditional feminist ways of thinking like many western countries. Not all of them mind you, but it would be hard to describe the cosmopolitan world of young upwardly mobile professionals in Budapest religious and traditional. I would say that about other architectural gems cities where the Hamburgs once rules like Krakow or Lviv, but not Budapest, different history.
If you as the man, enjoy cooking and cleaning and getting divorced or never getting married staying in a perpetual boyfriend/girlfriend relationship as you raise kids, good for you. I am a conservative. Jump up and down and dislike me if you like for that, but I prefer girls that nurture and take care of the family and try to stay beautiful compared to feminists who are chasing a career while their kids are in day care. Therefore, for marriage I think Eastern European countries are a better choice if you are searching for a bride, a more traditional wife than Hungarian women, given the current social changes.
Are all Hungarian girls liberal and feminist? No, it is a generalization. More exceptions then noun declinations in the Hungarian language, and that is a lot.
Again this is a generalization and not a statement about individuals. Further, maybe you are a guy that does not believe marriage is forever, in this case the new modern thinking European culture is for you and feminist thinking is a positive thing. For me, I prefer a traditional marriage.
I think Budapest girls are also liberal (unlike their neighbor Slovakia) compared to the girls in the countryside, at least from what I have personally observed. This means that although in theory catholic they are not that traditional, like the same girl living in the villages. They believe in divorce, single parent homes etc. So there are no real great advantages to dating Hungarian girls for love if they hold those views, which are not much different from say a liberal Boston girl. Unless of course, you are attracted to this modernist thinking. Me, I am not.
Why Budapest or Magyar girls might not be for a traditionalist
- Hungary has one of the highest depression rates in the world. The people there are depressed and complain about their own country a lot. I hope this changes as I think they are good people, but communism made them cynical. I hope this changes. I think it there is a statistical correlation between loose of faith and values and depression. It is existential anxiety, think of Camus, or Woody Allen.
- A marriage with a Magyar woman will end in divorce over 67% of the time compared to other European countries like Poland which is around 23%, some that have a 5% rate. It is one of the highest in Europe in contrast with the overall rate according to EuroStats of 44%. Marriage is about love and love is not conditional. But to these brides I guess it is.
- Most Hungarians today are really democratic and open, but socially very liberal. I am liberal when it comes to the freedom, but not in terms of values that are not tempered by faith. Again, disagree with this if you want, but this is just one man’s view of the world.
- If you meet a Magyar girl in the UK she sometimes is not as humble as a Hungarian back home. Hungarian girls in the country are much more humble and much nicer. Huge generalization, but often western culture makes traditional girls more liberal when they move to the big city.
- Many Budapest girls are feminists and not pro-life. I think this goes against being a mother, so any lady that thinks this way should not date.
- Magyar girls are hot-blooded, in my experience, it’s the culture not the group of people of course. Some guys like this, and for a short-term relationship this might be good but for the long-term, not way. Peace and love should govern your relationship not a hot-blooded emotional roller coaster.
The above is my personal experience or a statistics I have found. I am sure this is not the case with all these ladies. I am sure there are many traditional devout peaceful Hungarians women who make wonderful wives. However, my personal experiences have clouded my understanding of them maybe. But even Magyar women living in Slovakian territories turned out to be too liberal for me, because of the post communist Eastern or central European experience generally. However, the key to the social changes have been connected with the young turning away from the faith. The ones that have faith are not like this in Hungary. If you want liberal you can go for peaceful calm laid-back Scandinavians not central Europeans who are a little more hot-blooded (I think it is the weather), unless you like that of course.
Chat with Hungarian girls
Best places to chat with Hungarian girls on the web are as follows:
- www.startlap.hu its a free Hungarian portal of sorts. Hungarian is a very hard language to learn so unless you are in love I would not try to learn this.
- love.hu is a dating site
- If you still want to date or chat with Hungarian girls check out free online dating sites that have Hungarian girls on them, these girls will speak English, in fact they will want to practice their language skills with you.
You disagree or would like to add something, let me know. I like Hungarian girls, just not the way society is influencing them.