I’ve never been in a Lamborghini but they exist.

Actually the most recent divorce rates compiled in the last few years say the divorce rate in America is hovering in the lower 40% range….I think the article cited perhaps it was because of the economic meltdown.

Hey now there may be something to that. Money or an abundance of it is corrupting.

I’m 3 days away from turning 21, so I’m not what you could call “well-traveled”, & I have not “been around the block” as many older men/women have. So, I’m expecting the classic, “oh, you’re young & you’ll find out when you get older”, or, “you’ve got your whole life ahead of you” routine. that’s fine; I’m not sure what my future will bring, but I am sure that I refuse to ever get married under any/all circumstances. I have a huge interest in possibly being a father someday [maybe adopting a child], but I also have absolutely no interest of any kind to be a husband; no interest at all.

To me, there are many compatible partners for every person. sure, they vary in terms of how compatible, but there is not one “super-special” someone like there is in fairy tales. I grew out of the whole “Santa Claus” phase when I realized he wasn’t real, & I have grown out of the classic, “there is someone perfect for you” phase too. Love is a lot like a fairy tale; it looks/sounds great, but it is just a pipe dream told to younger kids to give them hope [& a positive spin on things] as the grow up. Every parent says, “when you grow up & get married” like it’s some non-negotiable certainty, but it wasn’t always like that. marriage today contains no more love than a prison. Divorce rates are insane, & the marriages that don’t end in divorce are mostly filled with cheating, lovelessness, anger, boredom, resentment, & an overall dead romance. of the very few marriages to stay together, almost all of them are unhappy; the real rate of truly happy marriages is closer to less than 5% [& im boosting that number to be fair to the people who say they have faith in marriage/love].
Basically, love & marriage are a bad decision no matter how you look at it. For example, if you went skydiving, & the man/woman running the course told you that only ~50% of the parachutes given out that day would open, would you still jump out of the plane? I’m not sure about you, but I would turn around, & say “F&%$ that, I’m not going!”. It’s the same with any decision in life; you weigh the consequences before jumping into something. Why would love/marriage be any different? You must look at the odds the same as if you were jumping out of the plane, or risk making a silly decision based on an unreliable emotion. basing a life-changing choice on a person who is going to change over the next 10, 20, 50 years is just foolhardy no matter how you phrase it.

Romantic [human to human] love is most likely not real because love is not tangible/testable. it is invisible & sly; love is unreliable & is not universal. how can you honestly tell if someone is in love? Can you really tell? Movie actors/actresses fake it on screen so easily. They portray/interpret what we think love is, but how do we really know if people love each other? the only love I have ever seen is between a father/mother & kids, family member to family member, & friend to friend in a close [almost family-like] friendship. I have never trusted a single couple to have really been in love; ever.

Another reason I do not believe in love is because of lust. lust changes people a lot; it takes them out of their normal frame of mind & makes them crave s__x. Sometimes a man/woman will become obsessed with it & lose him/herself in the pursuit of s_x. lust is too often confused as love. If lust can change a person that much, just think of how unreliable love is; there is no way to know love from obsession, from lust, from attachment, from infatuation.

A final reason for me not believing in the validity of human to human love is animals & reproduction. animals have s_x & couple for a small interval of time, but then split-off & leave each other eventually. such is the way of sexual reproduction. no animal on Earth, save man, has ever been associated with romantic love – only friendship love, or family love. so, it is safe to assume that we are no different; we couple for boom-boom, & then part ways like our animal counterparts. such seems to be the way of nature. also, what about asexual organisms, like plants? If you believe in human to human romantic love, why not plant to plant love? or fungi to fungi romantic love? We tend to leave those classifications out of the discussion because they do not have sex, but then what does that say about love? Love can only exist with s_x? It seems lust plays a huge part in love after all.

The point is, that if no animals of any kind [& no plants/fungi/bacteria, etc. of any kind], engage in romantic love, why would humans be the exception? Do we have any real evidence to show dogs/cats/monkeys/reptiles cannot think or love? Of course not; but, we also have not a single thread of evidence to support that they love romantically either. as far as we can tell, the only reason organisms engage in any sort of romantic behavior is to engage in intercourse & reproduce. So, why would humans be any different? love could just be confused for lust or a parasitic relationship to survive [a weaker organism latching onto a stronger organism to help each other mutually].

No matter how you look at it, love is only real in the sense of family members, very close friends, & certain things in life that you enjoy. For example; if someone gets a sensation from riding a motorcycle, & they crave motorcycles all the time [they work on them, the ride them everywhere, they fix them, they sell them, etc], then it’s safe to say that person “loves” motorcycles. this is more “true love” to me than if that person “loved” a man/woman. Why? Because motorcycles are unchanging in their feeling – you can ride a motorcycle ten years from now & still get the same sensation from it as you did riding today. the same is not true with people; people change, feelings change, & a person is not the same ten years later as they were today. The bottom line is; find the things in life that you truly love & keep them close [friends, an activity, a hobby, etc]. That is real love; human to human [romantic] love can only be one of two things mathematically [based on statistics/surveys];

1. Real, but extremely rare [less than 5% of all marriages/couples].
or
2. Fake; a trick played on us by the human mind & nothing more [electrical signals in the brain/body].

-For the optimist, love will always be real; such is the way of their thinking.
-For the pessimist, love can exist or not exist.

The trick is having the close proximity of one another’s needs. On top of that, constant Communication is a very important tool cause’ now two entities are being one. That is the commitment I think we all have been striving for. When one entity decides to leave even after communicating with the other thinking that is okay to make his/her departure temporary. Things might happen. “knowing is not understanding” and understanding comes in different levels.

Active Listening is another skill one needs to have for enhancing the Communication between the two entities.

Each individual seeks for a level of Appreciation and to spend quality time for the other. If those needs are not met. There’s also a chance of the bond between the two entities to separate.

All these qualities are needed for basic trust and understanding.

The above are my thoughts about connecting the two entities in union. However, living together is a totally separate issues.

The life style one chooses. Does it match or is it a close match to that of the other connecting entity?

I believe in crushes and after the crush comes love. My opinion is that the lasting love is not love at first sight but it could be. As my beliefs are that love at first sight is just meeting someone who fits nicely on the appearance level. For example: you like a certain shade of the color blue. So no matter what the thing is, that object would be an eye catcher to you. The bigger space it takes up, the more of an eye catcher to you. Whether you need it or not, it just catches your eye.

I believe that the trick of a crush is like the delusional period of “Love”. It is also the best time to find out more about that person. When it ends, make sure that the person is willing to commit a union with you. Having common topics to share together.

Then again the commitment for both entities would once again be put to a test of endurance. With the basic trust and communication which was once build upon.

key point: A relationship doesn’t really ends, it needs to be constantly build and to work on.